Re: ping: Mazza


"Dawn" <dawn.sellick@xxxxxxxxxxxx> wrote in message
news:axUIg.19333$2w1.275@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
monkfish wrote:
"Dawn" <dawn.sellick@xxxxxxxxxxxx> wrote in message
news:UfTIg.8752$HO5.4864@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Hi Timmy

Well, I've got counselling this afternoon, and could do with three hours
rather than 50 minutes to cover the events of last week, and my dream last
night.


In the past, i have found it a useful form of 'therapy' to write about some
of
my 'issues'.

Instead of discussing them with someone else, it's kind of like discussing
them with myself.

You don't have to show what you write to anyone else. In fact, if you write
only for yourself, you can say whatever you want without worrying about
offending anyone else.

I know for a fact you are intelligent and eloquent enough to do something
like that.

My second book was written about my experiences playing for a five-aside
football team.

I say some very unkind things in it (although every word is the truth -
that's why it's so unkind), and the whole thing is terribly self-indulgent -
and something no one else would want to read (they wouldn't understand
the references to players, teams, events, etc., even if they did) - but it
helped me deal with a stressful situation.

As an alternative to quitting the team, it allowed me to find a new
psychological 'space' outside the team's narrow mindset.

It was a useful exercise - not only in terms of personal development, but
also for the chance it provided for me to begin to flesh out my own ideas
about philosophy and so forth.

That's why, although it is the least accessible thing i have written (and
that's saying something!), it is in many ways the most interesting - and the
most important.

BTW, after i gave up on my writing just before Christmas, i un-gave up on it
sometime in the spring.

A few months ago, however, i re-gave up on it.

Maybe somewhere further on down the line i'll re-un-give up on it again.

Maybe not.


I'm also worried that the Trust will stop my counselling as I've
self-harmed :-(


So they deny help to the people who need it the most??

That's insane.

Is this new measures to reduce the waiting list?

Doctor: "How are you today?"
Patient: "Very low. I'm feeling very desperate. I self-harmed."
Doctor: "You did what!!??!! After everything i've done for you? Begone,
foul wretch!"
Patient: "But Doctor, i don't know what i'll do if you turn me away. I've
got no one else to turn to."
Doctor: "Just leave, damn you. Never darken my doorway again!"

Or . . .

Doctor: "How are you today?"
Patient: "Fantastic! I haven't felt this good in years!"
Doctor: "You're cured! You won't need to come back here ever again - and i
can play golf all day. Brilliant!"
[They dance.]

etc.


Generally, mood is low.


((((((Dawn))))))


Thanks for asking. You're sounding good at the moment.


Have you ever read 'Misery' by Stephen King?

Briefly . . .

Paul Sheldon - author of the popular series of "Misery Chastain" romance
novels - is pulled out of the mangled wreck of his car by Annie Wilkes.

She is not only Paul's 'number one fan', she is also a nurse.

Instead of taking him to hospital, she nurses him back to health herself in
her secluded home.

It soon becomes apparent that she is bi-polar - and when the rainy season
comes, her mood plummets. She becomes listless, apathetic - obviously
terribly depressed.

In the end, her mood gets so low she tells Paul she has to go away to be on
her own in her "Laughing Place" (named in honour of Br'er Rabbit, another of
her favourites).

"But i don't do much laughing there," she tells him. "Mostly i just scream."

Today is one of those rainy afternoons that have always reminded me of the
story of Annie's laughing place. I wish i had somewhere to go where i could
scream and scream and scream and no one would hear me.

Let us know how counselling goes.


Timmy


Dawn



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