- From: csaenemy <csaenemy@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx>
- Date: 22 Nov 2005 00:38:55 GMT
I've learned over the years to bury the memories of things that have caused
me pain or distress in the past, got it off to a fine art. Potentially
triggering stuff that comes along from time to time is rapidly ignored. I
really thought I had it sorted. Trouble is my subconcious won't let it go.
When I'm asleep I talk a lot, and lately the crap that's coming from my
mouth has been quite distressing to my wife Shell. I wake totally unaware,
but being very perceptive I see that she's upset, and then it's just a
matter of time before I persuade her to tell me what I said.
I've had thoughts in the past about a demon living within me, struggling to
get to the surface and take control. It seems to be finding a way to cause
trouble now. Sometimes it just talks bollocks. I can cope with that. Why is
it raking up all this crap that was over thirty years ago?
I've been depression free for a good while now, but this isn't helping to
keep me on an even keel.
"When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly
stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be twenty-one, I was
astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years." .. Mark
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