Always tell the truth

In a trial, a Southern small-town, the prosecuting attorney called his first
witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her and
asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know me?"

She responded, "Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you since
you were a young boy, and frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me.
You lie, you cheat on your wife, and you manipulate people and talk about
them behind their backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the
brains to realize you never will amount to anything more than a two-bit
paper pusher. Yes, I know you."

The lawyer was stunned! Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the
room and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?"

She again replied, "Why, yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a
youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can't
build a normal relationship with anyone and his law practice is one of the
worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three
different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him."

The defense attorney almost died.

The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench and, in a very quiet
voice, said, "If either of you idiots asks her if she knows me, I'll send
you to the electric chair."


.

Relevant Pages

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    ... Lawyers should never ask a Southern grandma a question if they aren't ... a southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his ... cheated on his wife with three different women. ... The defense attorney almost died. ...
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  • OT From Grandma, on politics old school style.
    ... In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, ... He approached her and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know me ... Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three ... Time Electronics. ...
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  • Re: *Joke: SOUTHERN GRANDMA
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  • Re: OT - southern Grandmas
    ... A Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness to the ... The lawyer was stunned! ... Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three ... The defense attorney almost died. ...
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  • Re: OT - southern Grandmas
    ... A Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness to the ... The lawyer was stunned! ... Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three ... The defense attorney almost died. ...
    (rec.crafts.textiles.quilting)