Re: Step-Daughter from Hell

On Mon, 06 Feb 2006 00:48:51 +0000, turtill wrote:

On 5 Feb 2006 16:35:57 -0800, "Huff" <Huffmast3r@xxxxxxxxxxx> wrote:

Make no mistake - we want her back with the rest of her family, there
are no disctinctions between herself and her siblings - they are all
addressed in the same way. Even the 2 1/2 year old has to pick up her
rubbish and take it to the bin....

I have been amazed at the responses you have received. I am also
surprised by your attitude but that could be because I brought my kids
up so long ago now. The youngest is 35 but I don't think he would even
stand for what you are. You and your wife own the house and are also
responsible for her welfare so stand your ground and just tell her you
decide what she does or doesn't do until she is old enough to legally
leave home and sleep around. Bring her down a peg or two as she
appears to be playing a tune on you. I hope things turn out well for
you and yours.

I think you have to stand your ground.

That said, you may have to let her make a mess of it and pick up the
pieces afterwards, which is not a pleasant prospect. I do have a daughter
of my own btw, albeit she is only 11, so I'm trying to put myself in your
shoes somewhat.

The problem with any sort of "reasoned negotiation" is handicapped by you
already being a "long way down the road" in terms of what you are doing
and where she is. I would suggest that you try and find some sort of
balance whereby she's allowed extra freedom for more responsibility, or
provide her with an allowance which is dependent on (i) she earns
something in a P/T job (ii) she does things around the house and so on,
but I suspect you are beyond that.

I think there's a tendency these days for people to view these things
(iPod, Sky, money etc.) as some sort of absolute right.

If she wants to live in this "lifestyle" you probably aren't going to be
able to stop her. People talk about underage sex, and you could report her
'boyfriend' but it is likely that no-one will take any notice. I think
what you must avoid doing is supporting her lifestyle.

None of this is very positive, I know. I'm not sure there is a good way
out of this, unless this is just a huge bluff to try and get her own way.

.

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