Re: Advice to a Mother Expecting a Third Boy by Mona Charen

On Jun 22, 12:57 pm, Jill <aske...@xxxxxxxxx> wrote:
On Fri, 22 Jun 2007 04:52:20 -0700, "d...@xxxxxxxxxxxxx"

<d...@xxxxxxxxxxxxx> wrote:
Mr. Lieven -- as well as Grizzlie, Society, Jill, and Jayne K. -- do
you consider this on-topic?

Why are you asking me this question? I don't recall taking you to
task for being off topic or indicating I didn't think your posts
belong here. For that matter I've never objected to Parg's or Mange's
or the Auk Fr00t postings for the same reasons.

I believe anyone is free to post whatever they want and if others
don't like it, they should ignore, delete, and killfile.

(Denise) Hi, Jill. I hope you're doing well. No, I don't recall you
taking me to task for off-topic posts either. At first, I was just
going to direct the question to Mr. Lieven, who frequently criticizes
me for off-topic posting, but then I decided to include some of the
other soc.men regulars in the question as well.



Advice to a Mother Expecting a Third Boy
By Mona Charen
Friday, June 22, 2007
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Sitting in a salon chair getting a haircut last week, I struck up a
conversation with a woman who told me, somewhat ruefully, that the
baby she was expecting would be her third boy. She's a lucky woman.

Oh, without question they will run her ragged when they're very young.
My brother used to say that our household needed the logistics support
of the 82nd Airborne. This would have been true even if one of mine
had not been hyperactive (but boy, was he). Hard to tell now that he's
a relatively sedate 15-year-old, but Jon as a youngster was like a
pinball -- only less well-controlled. Having lived it, I can spot a
hyperactive kid at 500 paces, and can only roll my eyes at those
skeptics who believe ADHD is a myth.

A woman looks at her new-born baby at a hospital in Huai'an, east
China's Jiangsu province May 13, 2007. Sunday, May 13 is Mother's Day.
REUTERS/Patty Chen (CHINA)
Related Media:
VIDEO: Talk Of The Town: Baby Joy For Julia
Jon also had a variety of developmental difficulties, some of which
contributed to a terrible bike accident when he was 10. He rode his
bike out of our driveway into the street (without checking for
traffic) and crashed straight into a passing car. Thank God we had a
strict helmet rule. His head was hit by the car's side view mirror,
and we found him unconscious in the street. Three days later, he
emerged from a coma and slowly began to regain the capacity for speech
and movement. A month later he was dashing up and down the stairs.

Dashing? No, flying! I once came upon Jon at the top of the stairs
seated on a toboggan. He had the ropes in his hands and was ready to
go -- probably planning to take his little brothers on the second
ride. He couldn't understand my intransigence.

Jon's brothers are far more inclined to verbal gymnastics. When David
(13) is provoked by Ben (11), he puts on his best mock English accent
and declares, "Sir, if you do not cease, I shall be forced to
challenge you to a bout of fisticuffs." They do sometimes get into
physical tussles (though far less than in the past), but they now have
a sense of humor about themselves. Recently, they were wrestling in
the family room, and I called out for David to do something (probably
practice one of his instruments). Ben called out, "I'm sorry, David is
being pummeled right now. Please leave a message after the beep.
BEEP!" Ben has also been known to put on a false whining tone and say,
"Mom, David's face hit my hand. Can you punish him?"

Girls are different. They seem inherently more organized, less sloppy
and certainly less rambunctious. You can, I've heard, take a girl
shopping. And I'm not certain about this, but I suspect that table
manners come more naturally to them. I have repeated instructions
about napkins in laps, elbows off the table and not talking while
chewing so many times that I've sometimes mangled it. The boys were
infinitely amused when I declared in stentorian tones, "No chewing
with your mouth full!"

They say girls can be very picky about food, but I don't think they
have anything on David there. He's better now, but for years he
regarded any new food -- strawberries, bread pudding and cherries
included -- as lurking poison. When he was about 9, we were out for a
day trip and searching for a lunch spot. We pulled into the parking
lot of a fairly promising-looking restaurant. David looked terribly
dubious. We tried to reassure him, but he narrowed his eyes. "What if
all they have is slushy bean casserole surprise?" His father didn't
skip a beat. "Then we'll eat it and drive home with the windows open."

Boys and boyishness were out of fashion for a couple of decades, but
that is changing. "The Dangerous Book for Boys" -- a celebration of
all things mechanical, natural and adventurous -- is flying off the
shelves. (I reviewed it in the last issue of National Review.) And as
my little balls of energy have matured into rangy adolescents with
deepening voices and facial hair, who play the trumpet and the bass
clarinet, who can do a knife dive into the pool, who amuse each other
and their father, and who continue to surprise and delight their
mother, I must say, I don't really like to shop anyway.


.

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