Re: to all...regarding the "bride price" set by 18 clans..

brother yaweh,

this is tangential to your question, but as you can see, the 18 xeem
"rules" backed by GVP has no consistent inter-state practice. if hmong
americans cannot even follow a potentially beneficial rule that is
clan-agnostic, how can the so called "freedom-fighters" continue in the
daily suffering thousands of miles away under GVP's control?

in other words, GVP's "control" show tremendous variations on small but
mutually beneficial issues, how can many others say this man has been
the trigger all along on the resistance in laos?

i am not supporting GVP or playing hlob Xej's "secret GVP agent" role,
i am simply bringing to our attention that the day of blaming GVP is
over and perhaps as many (hmong and non-hmong alike) have pointed out,
hmong people look to themselves as part of the problem and take
collective responsibility.

in california, ordinary marriages start at 5K. the 5K cap is
reinterpreted as a starting point; minimum wage, if you will. and then
the parents add "merits" on top to boost the dowry. as one of my uncle
stated when one of our brothers married a $15K wife, "this is no longer
marriage, this is selling your daughter." the story to $15K was 1) got
a bachelor, 2) went to a superb university, 3) very obedient, 4)
parents helped through rain and hell with money and time to get through
school, etc... as you can see, most of these reasons deal with academic
education. very sad and narrow minded, in my opinion, but that was not
my daughter and so i cannot empathize at all. but still, 15K plus X
thousands in other expenses? hmong wedding practices are spinning out
of control with the dowry, much like European/Christain weddings.

of course, this is america, and they can do what they want. as i stated
earlier, if you use hmong culture/laws to marry, please please please,
do not backstab your heritage and use american culture/laws to divorce.

.

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