Newlyweds lend a hand in Cambodia's struggle against war, poverty

Posted on Mon, May. 26, 2008
BY CHRIS GRAY
Philadelphia Inquirer

SIEM REAP, Cambodia -- Let's be honest: It was the specter of tigers,
temples and tom yam soup that led my husband and me to honeymoon in
Southeast Asia. We wanted an adventure to remember, on a continent
where neither of us had been.

But as I researched our trip, I realized that we should spend at least
a little time giving back to people who are still struggling for the
basics after decades of war and poverty.

We found a way to have it all in Siem Reap, Cambodia, home of the
ancient temple complex Angkor Wat -- and Ponheary Ly, a tour guide who
considers it her mission to help educate as many Cambodian children as
possible.

I found Ly, a Siem Reap native and survivor of dictator Pol Pot's
labor camps, through the Asia message board on Fodors.com. Ly, 44, is
a veteran guide who has arranged private tours of Angkor Wat and other
Siem Reap attractions in both English and French -- languages she
learned in secret during the Vietnamese occupation of Cambodia --
since 2000.

A former English teacher, Ly has also worked for seven years to enroll
children in Cambodian schools. While public school in the country is
ostensibly free for the first three years, many rural children do not
have the $12 necessary for shoes, school supplies or uniforms, she
said.

''As a teacher, I knew about the difficulties of the kids and families
who couldn't send the kids to schools,'' she said. ``Also, I found
that the kids are smart, but they don't have any occasion to show how
smart they are. To build the country, we have to build the education
for all people, especially the kids.''

It's a message that Ly's clients -- mostly Americans who prefer
independent travel with native guides to packaged tours -- could
support. In addition to touring the temples, more and more visitors
asked Ly whether they could visit the schools and donate money for
bicycles, supplies and uniforms.

Lori Carlson, formerly of Austin, Texas, was one such convert. When
she visited here in 2005, Carlson was struck by Ly's dedication. On
her return to the States, she founded the Ponheary Ly Foundation
(www.theplf.org), a registered nonprofit that channels money directly
to the schools.

By last December, Carlson, 48, had raised $90,000 for five schools --
and quit her job to move here to work full time with Ly. She formed a
board of directors for the PLF, which distributed school supplies to
1,955 children last fall.

''I believe the travelers who go to visit the temples at Angkor Wat
understand they bear at least some of the responsibility to gently
nudge these children toward school rather than reinforce the idea that
it's good to stand on the corner and beg dollars from tourists,'' she
said.

With such strong advocates, Don and I were excited to meet Ly and do
our part. We arrived here to find a city undergoing massive change.
The number of tourists visiting Angkor Wat, a UNESCO World Heritage
Site since 1992, has exploded in recent years, spurring an increase in
hotels, shops, restaurants and other businesses.

While the influx of dollars has been good for many Cambodians
(merchants prefer U.S. dollars to the Cambodian rial), it's
disconcerting to see barefoot bicyclists ride past $800-a-night
hotels. Young children hawk maps, books and trinkets near the temple
grounds; tuk-tuk drivers fight over $1 fares.

That's not to say that Don and I eschew luxury (it was our honeymoon,
after all). We turned down a $20 room at Ly's simple guesthouse,
primarily because it didn't have a pool, which we considered essential
to deal with the area's crushing humidity. At $95, our poolside room
at Bopha Angkor was spacious yet not ostentatious, and the package
included daily breakfast, a traditional Khmer dinner and a massage.

Just a few hours after we landed, we went to Angkor Wat with Ly's
brother Dara as our guide. There are more than 300 temples in the
complex, but Dara steered us to the ones that would provide the most
interesting backdrops for my husband, the photographer.

As we sweated in the 90-degree heat, I asked Dara about his family's
experience under the Khmer Rouge. He told us that his father, a
teacher in Siem Reap, was among the first wave of educated people to
be killed under Pol Pot's regime. As a result, Dara and his siblings
were sent with their mother to the countryside to work.

It's a sobering tale, and we heard more from Ly over the next few
days. Ly, who was 13 when the Khmer Rouge came to power, and her
siblings survived, mainly because villagers would leave food for them
at night.

''We were given this much rice,'' Ly told us, holding up the tip of
her finger. Dara would ''crawl out on all fours, like a cat'' to get
extra food; sometimes, actual cats or monkeys would have gotten to the
rations instead, she said.

Still, the extra nourishment kept the family alive -- and the Khmer
Rouge noticed. Officials asked her mother why her children were still
alive when so many other youngsters had died, Ly said. When her mother
refused to answer, she was horribly beaten.

Such atrocities were common in the Pol Pot years. Yet most Cambodians
don't like to talk about the time under the Khmer Rouge, Carlson said.
It's rare to find it discussed in schools, primarily due to the
country's Buddhist beliefs, which hold that people -- even war
criminals -- are responsible for their own karma.

Ly is different, Carlson said. She understands that it's important to
talk about the past so it doesn't happen again. We were talking in
Ly's van, on our way to deliver lunch to the 476 children at Knar
school, out in the Cambodian countryside. On the road, we saw men on
bikes toting crates filled with piglets and open huts with children
playing in the dirt.

Cambodian families expect all children, no matter how young, to
contribute economically, Ly told us. Which is why even the kids who
are lucky enough to go to school attend for a half day; at home, they
are needed for chores, farm work or other money-making ventures.

In addition to a donation made before our trip, we gave Ly $40 for
lunch, which buys two noodle packets for each child. That's essential,
Carlson said, because if the child received only one packet, he or she
would take it home to the family instead of eating it. The school
tries to feed the children at least once a day to make sure they have
enough energy to learn, Carlson said.

We arrived at Knar School, which consists of several one-story
classrooms. As Don carried the boxes of noodle packets into the rooms,
the children's eyes grew wide. They straightened in their seats and
thanked us by pressing their hands together and bowing.

Carlson and Ly showed us around the school and talked about the
improvements that have been made. Incentives such as bicycles,
uniforms and extra noodle packets show the families that there are
tangible benefits to their children attending school, Carlson said.

''I would like to have my country be the same as the other
countries,'' Ly said, with Cambodian children able ``to have good
education to work well to get out from the poor life.''

The children seemed to love school, showing off their uniforms and
books. An impromptu game of soccer ensued, with Don in the thick of
it. It was an emotional sight for me, which sparked later discussion:
Although we had been together several years, Don and I had never
talked about the greater good we could accomplish as a couple.

It's a conversation that all newlyweds should have, wherever their
honeymoon takes them. For us, road-testing our fledgling marriage in
an underdeveloped country not only gave us the adventures we sought,
but also set the course for a more permanent path. And that's
definitely a trip worth taking.

IF YOU GO

There are no direct flights to Siem Reap from the United States. You
can fly there from various Asian cities, including Bangkok, Hong Kong,
Singapore, Kuala Lumpur, Ho Chi Minh City and Hanoi.

We stayed at Bopha Angkor (www.bopha-angkor.com), booking the
``Poolside Evasion package.''

We booked Ponheary Ly as a guide by e-mail (ponhearyyahoo.com). Ly
charged us $145 for 2 ½ days of touring, which included three half-day
sessions at Angkor Wat, the visit to Knar School and a visit to the
floating village on Tonle Sap lake.

Information: Ponheary Ly Foundation, www.theplf.org; www.tourismcambodia.com;
www.angkorwat.org
.

Relevant Pages