Re: SANTA CLAUS - The spirit of Christmas

To all men, this is very true and if you think this won't happen to you,
think again.

Have a good one.


"Anonymous via the Cypherpunks Tonga Remailer" <nobody@xxxxxxxxxxxxxx> wrote
in message news:20051222230604.979F3170D6@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
> Santa Claus was found dead yesterday hanging on the Christmas tree in the
> front of the Parliament House in Canberra, Australia. He allegedly
committed
> suicide.
>
> Recently, one Friday, Ms. Claus went to the local police station and
> complaint that her husband was abusing her by violently laughing (like
Ho-HO-Ho
> instead of Ha-Ha-Ha), Policewomen in charge immediately arrested the
abuser
> and put him in the jail to wait for police prosecutor's return from
weekend
> until Monday. There was no need to search for any evidence as everyone
knows
> that all men are violent and abuse is defined in the law as anything man
can
> do so why to search for evidence if everything done by men is legally
> domestic violence. Also, this was what she had to do as per Family
Violence Intervention
> Program.
>
> On Monday morning, Santa was handcuffed, and after being strip searched
and
> photographed, he sat in the front of Special Family Prosecutor on the
local
> Magistrates Court. The Prosecutor hiding behind his glasses and under the
> wig, was not interested to hear what Santa had to say as he also know that
> all men are violent and arrest was enough good proof for that. He
> just asked with strong voice: "Guilty or not guilty". Santa answered: "Not
> guilty". Prosecutor issued interim Domestic Violence Order preventing
Santa
> to go home and his workshop on the North Pole, to change his underpants or
> take anything from the home, and not contact anyone including all elves,
> children etc.. As Ms. Santa occasionally visited Santa's workshop,
prosecutor ordered that Santa can't go back to
> North Pole at all and decided that hearing would be in 45 days.
>
>
> Santa was released on the street. He didn't have any money or documents in
> his pocket because he was dragged to police padded wagon straight from his
> bed and police didn't neither let him to dress properly nor to take
anything
> from his home. He went to nearest park and sat on the bench. He was hungry
> and depressed, asking himself "who will finished the toys and check the
list
> twice if I can't do it any more". He slept few nights on the park bench as
> shelters only exist for Australian women, eat scraps from the rubbish bins
> as he was ashamed to show-up in some soup kitchen. His dignity put him in
> hiding.
>
> After 45 days, totally depressed and very slim, Santa appeared on the
> Magistrate Court hearing. The Magistrate was black-haired fat short women
> and immediately when he wanted to say something in his defence, she stop
> him. She was talking to him about woman rights and equality of man and
> woman. Strangely she didn't said anything about men's rights. Santa didn't
> have a lawyer as a free Legal Aid is also only for women in Australia. Ms.
> Claus had a special family lawyer Mr. Nil Law supplied to her by the Legal
> Aid for free as she never worked in her life and had no income. She was
> actually claiming single parent pension from Contralink on the basis that
> Santa left home one Christmas night so they are separated. Two dwarfs were
her
> witnesses at Contralink, they also witnessed to each other and also
obtained
> pensions for themselves, as this was all what was needed. Of course,
> Contralink do not check if people are actually married and live together
as
> they duty is to always protect woman wearing pink. This is politically
> correct. Ms.Claus didn't tell to Santa that she is receiving pension and
> other benefits for single mother as Santa will probably told her that this
> is wrong. Instead she wisely choose to spend money on herself and have a
> love affair with the Red Nose reindeer but accepting free accommodation,
> food, cloths, overseas trips, credit cards, new car and
> other things provided by Santa, wisely keeping quiet and pretending that
all
> is normal while Santa was to busy to notice the laugh under the red nose
of
> the Red Nose reindeer.
>
> Magistrate, just partially interested, listen this sad Santa story before
> stoping him and just said: "Women are free today. You have no right to
> prevent them from enjoying life and they have right to love whoever they
> want". Santa told: "But we were married for so many years and I put all my
> income and work and free time in my family. I never cheat or abuse her.
Magistrate said: "you wouldn't be
> arrested if you were innocent. You can be charged for offending police and
> Government". Santa said: "Marriage is like a long life contract and I did
my
> share and always paid all bills, provided home and income. It is defined
in
> the Australian marriage act as relationship for life with exclusion of all
> others, even police, courts and even reindeers. There must be some
> obligation for wife to contribute to the family and not sleep with the
> reindeer". Magistrate said : "No. There is no any. You live in the past."
> Magistrate made domestic violence order final and extended it for further
24
> months.
>
> Santa realised that he has no home and family any more. Magistrate also
> established few new Restraining Orders preventing Santa to disturb the Red
> Nose Reindeer and his friends. There was no need for
> restraining the reindeer as his wife didn't know for love affair so why to
> bother. Magistrate also issued more Restraining Orders for various people
> who were friends of Ms. Claus and reindeer as "there was a danger that
Santa
> can harm them as he is violent man and now has a criminal record for the
next 10 years" she said. Reindeer
> and his false witnesses were laughing in the background.
>
> As Ms. Claus was on Contralink and Child Support Agency counted as a
"single
> mother" for years, she immediately downloaded Divorce Kit from the Family
> Court website and requested divorce. Child Support Agency sent a letter to
> Santa ordering him to pay to Ms.Claus $3,500 each month for their 3
children. He said that he never knew about child support
> as his wife was destroying all letters previously sent and now he is
> unemployed and can't pay this. Child Support Agency said that he had good
> income last year and this year income does not count.
>
> On Family Court divorce hearing, Ms.Santa got home and workshop on the
North
> Pole, Santa's superannuation and all family assets as "this is in the best
> interest of children who will stay with her". Judge also awarded to her
> jingle-bells, snowslide, all undelivered toys and maintenance of $4,500
paid
> monthly. Santa complained that he is now unemployed and can't pay this and
> toys belongs to children, but judge and Ms.Claus barrister were just
> laughing as they knew they did an excellent job totally complying with the
> Australian law. Santa first claimed that he still love Ms.Claus and that
he
> didn't had any possibility for reconciliation as all restraining orders
are
> still valid but that was ignored. He was also charged with contempt of
Court
> crime as he claimed that all this is "a legal farce" and "there is no
> justice on the Australian courts"..
>
> Santa went out very sad and very disappointed and hang himself on the
> Christmas tree as he has no any purpose for living any more. He was
> prevented to contact his children, he lost everything and he was not able
to
> defend himself and his marriage. Police Commissioner told to media that
> there is no any suspicious events in connection with this case and this is
> private matter and police has no jurisdiction to be involved except in
just
> arrest as they have to protect women from domestic violence. But, it is in
public interest that from today
> laughing Ho-Ho-Ho is forbidden and declared as a terrorism. All
Australians
> accept this with comment :" Santa got what he deserved! Most of us never

> believed in him anyway". Nobody except few children believed that Santa
was
> ever good, hard working father and husband.
>
> In the Australian Parliament, members of the Lie-beral Party and Liquor
> Party said that Santa case is a proof that we need the war on terrorism
and
> Prime Minister declared that ASUO told him there is evidence that Santa
> delivered Christmas gift to terrorist Osaka Bin Laughing while he was
child
> so he conspired for long time with Al Quadra, which is well known
terrorist
> organisation because other President of other state told him that. Anyway,
> if Santa is still alive, he would be detained in Qantasnamo Bay without
any
> help from his Government. Santa was also laughing Ho-Ho-Ho instead of
> Ha-Ha-Ha and this is politically incorrect and not appropriate, very
violent
> and abusive as one woman already complained about that. Someone added that
> "Santa also didn't shave and usually very violently wear red dress and his
poor wife should now get
> all support after surviving her tragic suffering and abuse of laughing and
> Santa's red dress for many years. So everyone was on Square.
>
> Before hanging himself, Santa wrote a letter to Attorney General Mr
Rudnick
> and Minister for family Kway Pietherson. Both of them politely replied
that
> they have no jurisdiction and everything is according to law. Santa wrote
> again to Mr.Rudnick but letter was returned with the note at the top that
> "they can't deal with this case as it was send on wrong address and was
not
> received" Same happened when he complained to Ombudsman, Human Rights
> Commission and his Local Member for the North Pole. Contralink National
Manager even told to his
> local Member for the North Pole that Santa is crazy, he live in the jail
and not on the
> North Pole at all and he was never married to Ms.Claus they just have same
> surname.
>
>
> HAVE A MERRY CHRISTMAS IF YOU CAN AS SANTA CLAUS IS NO MORE WITH US !
>
>
> *** This is actually almost true story except that the name of the author
> and others are slightly changed to Santa Claus, his wife to Ms.Claus and
he
> obviously survived attempt of suicide. Similar cases are closer to you
than
> you may think - just visit any night, any park or unlocked public toilet
in
> Australia near you, and you will found unshaved slim man sleeping there.
TV News reported yesterday more than 100 homeless men sleep in Canberra only
after being "processed" by spouse and the judiciary.
> Procedure described above happened every day to about 250 Australian men,
7
> of them commit suicide.
>
>


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