Re: OT - Really discouraged / discussion request

"Kajikit" <kajikit@xxxxxxxxxx> wrote in message
news:5cofv6lrq6639v973go19kptl42ulchqcd@xxxxxxxxxx
On Tue, 14 Jun 2011 14:05:08 -0500, "CatNipped" <myaddy@xxxxxxxxxxx>
wrote:

Even after eating well yesterday, this morning my (well calibrated)
digital
scale said I weigh only 85 pounds this morning. The force-feeding when
I'm
ill, the drinking and eating of things I really hate, just for the protein
and calories, is just so not worth it when it just doesn't help.

It's weird, I've seen people who know they're dying, and most are pretty
calm and accepting about it - I guess it's a natural response to the
inevitable - a sort of "survival" mechanism kicking in. I've never seen
or
known about those moments of panic when faced with that great unknown of
what's on the other side, if anything.

Atheists take comfort in believing they just "turn off" without fear of
mystic consequences (and I'd *LOVE* to hear some opinions of atheists here
about this - I'm in that wishy-washy category of "agnostic"). I don't
"know" it, but I fear an omniscient retribution - an unimaginable
punishment
for all the many wrongs I've done in my life and at times like now, I do
panic. I'm scared, and it's a fear that nobody on this earth can
relieve -
ultimately everyone is born alone and everyone dies alone no matter how
many
friends may surround you, and being alone has always been my biggest fear
in
life.

I know this is a terribly morbid subject, but I would really, really,
really
love to hear what other people, both religious and atheist, feel about
this.
It would *SO* help me sort out my feelings and think a bit clearer right
now. I just hope it's not too much to ask.

BTW, we used to be able to talk about "hot topics" like this without
devolving into a flame war - I hope that still holds true now.

People aren't automatically at peace with themselves when they come to
the end of their journey in life. They have to work through it. It's
okay to be afraid. It's okay to be angry. It's okay to want to kick
and scream about what's happening to you. You didn't get a choice in
it. Nobody really does - in the end, everyone is going to be in your
shoes. We don't come with a 'get out of death free' card. I hope and
pray from the bottom of my soul that you're going to recover from this
thing and that it will be a long time before you have to say goodbye
for the last time. But you know more about your own health than I do.
If you get involved with hospice they have people who can help you and
your family work through all of this stuff. Some of my friends are
hospice chaplains and they spend their working lives helping people
come to terms with the ending of their days. They're not just there
for the people who say 'oh, I'm a Catholic' or 'I'm a Baptist' or
whatever...

But you asked what we think about heaven and hell, so I'm going to
give you my answer.

The idea of dying is scary to everyone, but you don't need to be
afraid of what's going to happen to you after you die sweety. God is
love Lori, perfect love... I don't believe in hellfire and brimstone.
God is not waiting to cast you into Hell because you didn't dot all
your i's and cross all your t's in life. You say you're an agnostic -
that means you don't know what's going to happen and if He's waiting
for you... that's okay too. I am absolutely certain that God is not
waiting to punish you for your sins, be they real or imagined.

I don't know what heaven actually looks like. I haven't even tried to
imagine it because the specifics don't matter to me. I find all of
those 'this is what Heaven is like' books to be rather silly in their
literal depictions of streets of gold etc. But heaven is where God is
and I know from the bottom of my heart that He is waiting to wrap his
arms around me and to draw me into His presence and to surround me
with His endless, bottomless love. And no matter how many millions of
people pass over to Him, there will ALWAYS be room for more. Nobody is
left outside the gates unless that is where THEY want to be.

I truly, deeply envy your assuredness and the comfort it must provide you.
I so wish someone could magically make me believe. However, like someone
else said, a Catholic upbringing by vicious, ignorant nuns beat that out of
me at a very early age.


--
Hugs,

CatNipped
See all our masters at: http://www.PossiblePlaces.com/CatNipped

See the RPCA FAQ site, by Mark Edwards, at:
http://www.professional-geek.com/rpcablog/

Email: L(dot)T(dot)Crews(at)comcast(dot)net




.

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