Re: The purpose of RPCA (long, you might want to get a beverage)


Kyla and her cat Mosey looked down and read the post
"Joy"
I certainly don't see any foot in your mouth, Pam. This was an excellent
post.

--
Joy

My mind is like a parachute...it functions only when open.

"tanadashoes"...

"Mosey =^..^="
Mosey gut hissed and raced da contents uff da uffenive stuF
HiiiiiiiiiiisPITT!!!
SkkkkkkkkkkkReeeeeeeRach!!!
*pees on dat meen manz sheetz n poops en is slippurz!!!



Sweetie,

I'm not Laurie, but like most of us in here, I opened this post. Let me
give you a bit of a history lesson. Back before I came in here and
started horking my hairball posts in 1998, all of the rec cat groups were
jumbled together in one big newsgroup called rec.pets.cats. They started
out as a bunch of nice people, but the number of posts grew to the point
that people were complaining about them. Also many people didn't like
meowchat (gives me headaches), or to read potentially gory posts about
cat health, or to put up with the maunderings of the rescue people (sorry
checked it out and didn't work for me) Not only that but there were a
lot of people who didn't like a lot of other people and everything got
really ugly.

So by mutual agreement (I understand that took months to hammer out)
rec.pets.cats decided to split up into its various factions. There still
is rec.pets.cats, but now there is also rec.pets.cats.health+behavior
(RPCHB), rec.pets,cats.community (RPCC), rec.pets.cats.rescue (RPCR), and
this group, rec.pets.cats.anecdotes (RPCA). I like this group. It has a
looser style with more leeway for off topic posts and more interest in
the various people in here.

We've had polls, Pine Cone's adventures with any one who wants adding
stories to the voyage, we care posts, purrs and prayers, and have
developed our own persona. I've noticed that most of the people in here
are geeks, many with computer experience (this is where I'd come first if
I need software and other computer information), a lot of us are in the
education business, many in scientific fields (often in both scientific
and education), many are involved in health care and other healing
professions. They're even kind enough to accept a lowly housewife who
substitute teaches for pin money as part of the group. We've given
second chances, even third and fourth chances. to those of us who make
mistakes.

I once posted a poorly written story about an event at our house that got
me hate mail from all over the world. I was called all sorts of names
and told that I shouldn't be permitted to have cats own me. I cried. Oh
man how I cried. I'd just found a place that I felt as though I could
talk to everyone about anything in any way I wanted and here there were
people sending me mail telling me to go away. I'm crying now remembering
the pain I felt. Then, among the hate email, I got an email from a
missing member of this group. It told me about his experiences after
making the same mistake I did. He'd written a humorous (I thought it was
funny) story about his kitties getting drunk and having a party. People
sent him the same kind of "eat s**t and die" (amazing how many were the
same people who sent me nasty grams) emails that I got. Like me, he
almost left the group. Then another poster sent him the same kind of
mail that he sent me and gave him the same advice he gave me.

Not everyone is going to like everything you post. The best thing is to
do your best, focus on the basis for the group (anecdotes) and put the
repeat offenders in your kill file. There are people whose kill files
are an honor to be a part of. Others who'd break my heart to put in
their kill file. We developed a rather nice treatment for trolls. We
either post recipes or send them litter box offerings depending upon the
post and the need. The person you are obsessing about isn't worth the
effort to keep bringing him up. All you are doing is letting him (I
assume it's a guy, he isn't a man) know that he got to you in a big way,
and are giving him the gratification he depends on. May I suggest that
you send him some litter box offerings and then go on with life.
Personal posts are not actively encouraged in here, though the occasional
ping is accepted. Generally, if you want to talk to someone privately,
you can ping them with an email me please, or turn it into a general post
(as I've done here) in order to educate others who may not understand how
we've developed over the years.

Vicky once called us a group where one can pull up a chair and have a
cuppa whatever we're drinking and chat. But part of the game is that the
chat is in hoomin and general; anyone can take part in the conversation.
We've laughed (who can forget the anticipation of waiting for another
missive from the immortal Dave Yehuddah or Bev in New Zealand) shared
information, cried (this was the first place that I let know about Rob's
tumors, after calling Rob's parents and his first sergeant), grieved
(Dave Yehuddah, JEM, Dusty, and Eve come to mind), rejoiced (Eve again),
told stories about, shared the quirks of our owners, and just gotten
together as friends. When you single out a person, no matter how
innocently, you are breaking into the dynamic of the group and
potentially destroying it.

Health in here is a touchy topic. Rob isn't the only member with cancer,
I'm just more unwilling to be quiet in my suffering. JEM died from her
cancer. Dave Yehuddah died from a heart attack. Several members are in
wheel chairs. Some of us are blind. Many have diabetes, heart problems,
mobility issues, and mental health problems. Some of us are flat out
crazy, like me. We can share a common anonymity in here. We don't come
in here to compare notes on our problems. We come here to get away from
the pain for a while. Please humor us in this and respect our
shortcomings.

Meow chat is cute, in the meow group. I don't go in there because I
can't handle the spelling, grammar, and sentence structure. It all gives
me a headache that goes beyond Tylenol. I'm pretty sure that I'm not the
only one who feels that way. I know that the meow cats are very sweet
and forgiving, but my cats were never taught meowchat and I don't want
them to learn now.

Don't ask me for my picture. Let me have my delusion of being 5'8",
skinny, dignified, and gorgeous instead of being the short blobby person
I really am. I'm sure there are others who agree with me on this. Not
all of us are cute like Christine, dignified like Annie and Sherry, sexy
like Mark, or handsome like Victor. Asking for our pictures makes us
choose between showing another person how truly gross we look or coming
up with a picture of someone else and passing it off as ourselves. That
one doesn't even work in sitcoms.

Please forgive me my total b*tch*n*ss and understand that I don't want to
lose you as a valued member of the group. If that were the case, I'd
have kill filed you like I have past members who I didn't consider worth
the effort of trying to reclaim. This is not the easiest group to slide
into and become a part of, partly because it looks like it would be easy.
Like our owners we're a snooty bunch. I hope that you and other newbies
who are trying out how to break into our group here in the smoothest
manner possible will be able to use at least part of my ramblings here
for your benefit.

Pam S. who probably stuck her foot in her mouth again

Pam, I'm sitting here in tears, and may I offer you a HUG for taking the
time and the patience to write me that long lovely letter. No, I don't
think you're being b*t*cy at all, and no you didn't stick your foot in your
mouth again, You are very informative and I read your letter to me in a
'kind' voice. :) I really appreciate the history of the different cat
groups and why we're here, and not 'there' and *gulps* I really appreciate
you not wanting to lose me and calling me a valued member...now I'm crying
again, because that just touched my heart Pam. I too, in the short time
I've been here, have felt like it's a place where we can sit down and have
our beverage of choice, and talk.
I feel it's a warm safe place to be.
About the health issues, I agree. I hate talking about MY own thingys but I
don't mind sending purrs, prayers or whatever to anyone who posts and is
suffering.
Heck, I'd ask them to send me their address and I'll send them a Cat get
well card. When a beloved Cat goes to RB, I too will and have sent some
sympathy Cat cards out to a few people here. I do have several people's
pictures from rpca, I put in a thread that IF someone wants to send me their
picture, send it to, and give them my e-mail address. I understand about
um,
'privacy', and don't bug people about sending me their picture and if I
have, I apologize. About the trolls of late, I don't usually respond that
way, maybe it was the full moon or something, but it really got my ire up
when a couple of people here, who I really care about, were being totally
scathed, and it might be hormonal, IDK, but I got hissed off and vented, but
I've said all I have to say to them. You're right...they're a waste of time
and need to be put in the litterbox:) I love the recipe idea...
Please don't get me wrong, Pam, I am FAR from perfect myself.
I really love it here and the people here have been so kind and caring to me
and each other, with purrs and prayers and also some of the funniest stories
and pictures that make me run through the house, searching for Depends
Pam, thank you again for caring about me, enough to take the time and the
love and patience to write to me and explain the things I need to know to
get along with the folks here. I read your letter 3 times....I'm not vain
to think everybody is going to like what I post, and I imagine I'm in a few
folks KF's, but that's okay, I deserved it.
I've only been here a couple of months, but I'm learning
I just love the fuzzy tummy threads and the upside downy
head ones and all the cute pictures of different kitties.
This is a fun place to be, and it is also a place, IMHO, a
place for asking for purrs and folks lighting candles...
that's wonderful.
Thanks for....well, taking time for me:)
Hug (I'm a hugger)
Kyla
--off for a much needed cat nap with a loudly purring Mosey








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