Re: Dad's Decline (OT and Long)

"bobblespin" <nospam@xxxxxxxxxxx> wrote in message
news:Xns9A516528D915Ebobblespin@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
"jmcquown" <j_mcquown@xxxxxxxxxxx> wrote in
news:pZudnVAdoN8LL1nanZ2dnUVZ_qmlnZ2d@xxxxxxxxxxx:

An update, which may be premature. After rallying and doing so well
upon his last admission to the hospital... after being moved from ICU
to a regular room and charming all the nursing staff, he stopped
eating. So they did the nasal feeding tube thing. At that point he
could still swallow. Now, he can't.

snip

Jill

This brings me back 20 years when my dad had a massive stroke, paralyzing
him on the right side and he was unable to swallow. They put in the
stomach feeding tube, but it only prolonged the inevitable for 2 weeks.
My
mother and I tried to let him go (we knew his wishes), but the doctor
refused saying they weren't there to kill people. My mother didn't cry
much at the time, but afterwards, she cried every day for years. I just
hope you don't have problems with the rest of the family, who often
criticize the actions taken by those who have to make the decisions, while
they are miles away and don't deal with it.

Take care, and as my dad used to say, chin up.
Bobble

The rest of the family may not need to know. When my husband was dying, I
knew his wishes, and talked things over with my children. We were all in
agreement. Near the end, the doctor said he could continue a particular
medication that would prolong things, but wouldn't really do any good. He
asked if I wanted him to stop it, and continue the morphine, which kept him
comfortable. After discussing it with the kids, I told him yes. A couple
of hours later, my mother-in-law was there when a nurse came in and said she
was going to put in a shunt so they wouldn't have to keep sticking needles
in him. Then she turned to me and asked, "Did the doctor tell you what he's
going to do?" I said yes. When he went out, my mother-in-law asked
sharply, "What is the doctor going to do?" I just said, "He's having the
nurse put in a shunt so they can give his medications more easily." She
accepted that. I don't think she would have agreed with our decision, so I
didn't tell her about it.

Joy


.

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