Re: Gamers These Days

Peter Huebner wrote:
I think it largely depends on social factors.

First up, were you brought up a gamer at all: I know numerous people who grew
up in non-playing households and mostly you have a dickens of a time getting
these ppl to partake in any kind of games, they will often drop out half way
through or not even be willing to try.

I grew up in a family that played games once in a blue moon (rummy,
Scrabble, and dominoes come to mind from childhood days). Of the four
of us, I stood out as the only real gaming enthusiast (unless you count
my dad's penchant for gambling). My parents and sister would willingly
play sometimes, and my mom would even show some enthusiasm for it.
Everyone would see the game through once it started, and maybe even
play again. But it didn't happen as often as I'd have liked. By age
ten or twelve, I owned a lot of games but could rarely find opponents
for them.

So, upbringing can't be the only factor, since I stood out as the only
gaming enthusiast in a family of lukewarm, occasional gamers.


Over to the other crowd. My wife grew up in a playing household, and she will
happily play cards or boardgames each and every day of the week, but you
absolutely cannot interest her in computer games. She came to computers late in
life, and they are a bogey to her rather than an area of interest.

My wife seems to have fond memories of games she played in childhood
and before she met me: Milles Bornes, for instance (which seems to be
her family's game; I've never yet played it, though we have a copy).
But she welcomed the computer age with open arms (she was in her
twenties when we got our first home computer), and she now plays
computer games every day, sometimes for hours at a time. Recently I
got her to play the card game Lost Cities with me, and she likes that
too--but one thing she especially likes about it is that it's short and
fast-moving. Just like the computer games she prefers these days
(action puzzle games).


I also grew up in a playing environment. I played cards as a kid, chess, go,
mah-jong as a student. I came to computers by choice in my 30ies, trying out a
new hobby after my first wife moved on, and fell head over heels into computer
games (amongst other computer related stuff). I never even found out about
European style boardgames until somebody mentioned them on
comp.sys.ibm.pc.games.strategic (it was the Billabong Gamers site that was
mentioned) and I just went on a shopping spree and never looked back.

I first got really enthused by games at age eleven or so; on rainy days
we got to play board games (Clue, Monopoly, Risk, etc.) in class during
recess--and I always prayed for rain. I got a neighborhood kid to
teach me chess when I was twelve--but then I never had anyone to play
it with very often, so I studied it on my own. At thirteen I
discovered board wargames (Avalon Hill, then SPI) and became instantly
hooked; that was my obsession for the next couple decades. In the
beginning I had a wargaming friend and even started a club; but after a
few years and a couple moves, I found myself without any opponents. So
I ended up playing the wargames solo--and it got to where I found that
very enjoyable. By the mid-90s, though, computer games had pulled me
away from wargames. Not only were computer games much more convenient,
but suddenly I had an opponent (the AI) for any game, anytime. I was
in gaming heaven!

I continued to do social gaming, though, relying mainly on Avalon
Hill's leisure-time games (Civilization, Merchant of Venus, History of
the World, Dune, etc.). I'd invite friends over, and we'd make a day
of it. Not very often, though--just once every few months.

The Internet ended up meaning nothing to me, gamewise. I tried PBEM
and online games, but I found I didn't really like the pressure of
human-vs-human competition and didn't want to interact with people
while relaxing at my computer. So, I'd still much rather play a
computer game against a good AI than against other people.

Online discussions, right here in r.g.b., however, did turn me on to
Euro (German-style) games. I was persuaded to buy a copy of Settlers
of Catan when it was much newer, and I did find it much easier to get
friends together to play that than the games we used to play. Settlers
is much simpler and shorter, with a nice balance of luck and strategy.

Still, our social games were very few and far between. A year or more
might elapse before we'd get together again. So the only other Euro
games I bought were two-player games that I could play with my wife.
As I said, she likes Lost Cities. She also likes Caesar & Cleopatra.
And one of these days I'll get her to try Hera & Zeus. (She didn't
like the Settlers card game, though; IIRC it seemed too belligerent to
her--she got tired of my arsonists and assassins.)


I do now play both. Computer games when I am on my own, board and card games
when we have other gamers around (and we have started a small games group).
We have friends with teenage kids where, the moment we turn up, the boardgames
come out and the playstation thingy gets turned off.

That's what I was expecting to happen at my in-laws' house, but it
didn't. Our first day there, people talked about the games they'd been
wanting to play (Milles Bornes and tile rummy for my MIL, other board
games for the kids, and Dungeons & Dragons for my teenage niece). But
in practice, everybody was into computer games all the time. Even my
MIL, the oldest member of the family, would play bridge online.

It didn't completely put an end to socializing, of course. Sometimes
two or three people would cluster around a computer--or we'd shut down
the games and go out to dinner or to a movie or to spend an afternoon
in the park. But I got the impression that computer games were just
too convenient, so nobody seriously thought about playing a card or
board game instead.


It's a culture, and largely in my opinion determined by how a family interacts
and how you grew up. I am reminded of how people eat: I know families where
every member walks into the house, goes to the fridge, grabs what's there and
retreats into some corner to do away with it. Occasionally somebody may choose
to cook, and then ppl go to the pot on the stove instead of grazing the fridge.
In our house every meal is eaten at the dining table in the kitchen, and
everybody will wait until the whole crew is seated before the action starts.

I'd say it also has to do with personality types. After all,
individuals make up families (and a culture of any kind). Some people
are more introverted, others more extroverted, for instance. And there
are other factors. But I think each of us is pretty much born with a
certain pattern of preferences (our basic personality), and that
pattern doesn't change much (if at all) during one's life. We do
change our behavior, of course, as well as many of our likes and
dislikes, and we develop various skill sets. But beneath all that, we
still have the basic personality we were born with.

To get the whole family to sit down to the kitchen table at the same
time takes a certain kind of personality. First off, you have to be
extraverted enough to reach out and connect with the other people.
Secondly, you have to be concerned with the "family spirit" and willing
to impose a little structure and accept a little responsibility. You
also have to be diplomatic enough to deal with any dissenters.

Some human personalities are better at those things than others, and
more comfortable with them.


Choices you make in life ..... and they can be re-evaluated. In your place I
would've made an active effort or three to set up a game, and, had I failed, I
would've given up --- but on the other hand, it might have turned out a roaring
success. I't like asking that girl out on a date: You never try, you never find
out. I personally think that the ppl who *are* inclined to play games are just
as much inclined now as they were 40 years ago and just as likely to try
boardgames. We host a lot of young overseas visitors in a 'work for board and
food' scheme and I'd say that about 60% are enthusiastic participants of our
boardgame sessions.

I'm sure you're right. Again, I'd say it also comes down to different
personalities. What you'd do in my place, or what I'd do in yours,
will never be the same as what the two of us actually do in our own
places. We're two different people. Probably two different *kinds* of
people.

I suppose the advent of computer games simply gave more options to
people. People like me, who were introverted to begin with and often
played solitaire, now had a way to play games without the social
interaction. Other kinds of people were still free to enjoy gaming in
their own ways.

The difference is: In the pre-computer days, we introverts often got
pulled into face-to-face board games, just because there were no other
options. If a family was sitting around on a rainy day, and TV got too
boring, somebody was likely to start a game, and we'd all join in. I
got used to that--which is why I kind of expected it when I recently
visited my in-laws. I was surprised that it didn't happen. And I
don't think it does happen as much anymore, because now we introverts
just play computer games.

Sounds like it's still different in your family, though. :-)

--Patrick

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