Re: OT Fools


Me:
>> Just sitting here watching the news on the tube. Those images of
>> brawls, trampling, pushing and shoving just sickens me. Jesus
>> himself would be trodden underfoot. (Or, more likely, He probably
>> would've driven them out like he did the money-changers in the
>> Temple!)

Primrose:
>I saw this article on another newsgroup. Downright scary!
>
> http://www.mercurynews.com/mld/mercurynews/news/13261978.htm

<snips and pieces>

>Police were eventually called to calm unruly shoppers who climbed over a
>display case and shouted in a desperate effort to get their hands on one
>of a couple-of-dozen Hewlett-Packard notebook computers -- on sale for
>just $22 off the regular price of $400.

Typical. All that agony for the *remote* possibility of saving 22
bucks... But, then again we live in the land of "Powerball" tickets.

>Customers sprinted to the counters, some leaping over them into the area
>where panicked clerks stood. A nearby display case was crunched to the
>ground, broken, witnesses said.

Pity the poor hired help. I truly feel for them. Dealing with public
sucks, but this must be suckage on steroid and crystal meth.

>``I heard a mother yelling at her child saying, `I told you, you needed
>to be aggressive, you needed to get that!' '' recalled shopper Debbie
>Pavao, of Santa Clara. ``And you could hear this young child saying,
>`But Mom, but Mom!' . . . The child couldn't have been more than 10 or
>11.''

What the kid really needed to do was to call up the organ bank to see
if they had any brains for mommy dearest. "It's an emergency!"

>Within minutes, police showed up and order was restored. No arrests or
>injuries were reported.

Due in part to the parka-padded, soft-assed couch potato lemmings
bouncing off each other like Nerf balls.

>A manager at the Mountain View store, who would only give her first name
>as Marilyn, downplayed the ruckus, calling it ``just a normal blitz day.''

A grizzled war veteran! Probably eats ground glass to dull the pain.

>But Atherton resident and customer Juliet Herbst wasn't impressed with
>Wal-Mart's handling of the blitz.
>
>``It's incredibly rude because the way they got us there was by
>advertising things that didn't materialize,'' she said. ``They had big
>advertisements all over the place and there was no offer for rain
>checks.''

Uhm, Juliet isn't exactly Mensa material is she? One wonders if the
expressions "bait and switch" and "limited quantities/while supplies
last" ring a bell? She should definitely keep her distance from real
estate ads, as she would have no clue that "rustic" means old and run
down money pit and "cozy" means too small for anyone but a family of
little people. Talk about yer babe in the woods.


>Three out of every four shoppers his group surveyed on Friday had made
>purchases, more than in years past, he said. ``If a retailer had big
>deals, they had many customers. If they had no deals, they had no
>customers. So you could walk through a mall and see one store that was
>packed next to another that was virtually empty,'' said Beemer.

Doesn't matter. The smart folks were home. The fools were in the
malls being parted from their money and fighting, kicking, screaming
and waiting in line, outside in the cold, for the privilege. Store
owners may or may not be winners here, depending on whether the baited
and switched stuck around long enough to buy alternative crap.

>At the Best Buy store in Santana Row, shoppers lined up the night before
>to get first crack at price-reduced electronics gear.

"Moooo....moooooo.....baaaa-aaa-aaahhhh..."

Also, I'm wondering how many full "Depends" undergarments were in any
given parking lot and store? Grandma smells funny and Pops is walking
in a peculiar fashion for a reason?

>By 8 a.m., the parking lots at Westfield Valley Fair in Santa Clara were
>jammed and late-to-the-mall shoppers were circling for open spaces like
>sharks.

More like turds circling the toilet bowl that never quite makes a
complete flush. Jiggle the handle and try again, chummy!

>Shoppers, weighed down by multiple bags, slowed only for quick breathers
>or a bite to eat before resuming the hunt.

Absolutely. Idiocy is hard work. Wasting your time builds up your
appetite.

>``It's tradition,'' said Trieu Nguyen

Some of our traditions might need pruning, I'd say.

>who showed up at the mall with
>his fiance, Katherine Chan, 26, before 6 a.m. He actually began his
>holiday shopping Tuesday, when he bought her an iPod nano.

So much for that surprise.

>``The alarm rang at 4 a.m.,'' said Chan, recalling the start of the
>shopping day like a bad memory.

Wait for the credit card statement in January, Mr. Nguyen. That will
be more like a bad hang-over.

>By 9 a.m., the San Francisco couple had collected an array of gifts
>bought at bargain prices. They picked up a duvet cover, regularly $200,
>for about $90 at Macy's, and some toys for as much as 40 percent off.
>They expected to get 95 percent of their holiday shopping done in one
>day.

Ever hear George Carlin's riff on "Stuff"? Give it a listen sometime!

>``Bloomingdale's always has good deals on professional clothes,'' said
>Kelly Arenas, 42, of Los Altos. ``So snap 'em up if you find them.''

That's a big "if" Ms. Arenas. Oh, and good luck finding a fitting
room. Oh well. If it doesn't fit, you can always come back after
Giftmas and stand in line for hours again in the return line.

>With all the bargains, it's as much a season of buying for yourself as
>for others.

Ah, now THAT'S a bit closer to home.

>Cecilia O'Donnell, the store manager at Nike Women at the Stanford mall,
>said most of the morning's customers were buying items for themselves.

Oh my. I'm not used to such straight reporting!

>By 11 a.m., employees had only wrapped three or four gift items, she
>said.

Bottom line. Massive consumer spending orgy. Par-TAY, Dude!

>But Brian Young, 34, of Laguna Beach, had dutifully acquired two gifts
>Friday morning: an iPod and a J. Crew sweater for his wife. He was
>visiting his in-laws in San Mateo.

Translation: Free room and board and a close launching pad for his
foray into wretched excess. Classy.

>He then went to work on himself: looking for items to put on his wish
>list.

Gimme, gimme, gimme! That's the spirit! :-)

David, sharpening his knives for this turkey of a holiday season
.

Relevant Pages

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