Re: Rec.arts.sf.fandom dues due

Laurie Mann <ldtm@xxxxxxxxxxx> wrote:
"Karl Johanson" <karljohan...@xxxxxxx> wrote:
It's that time of year again. Everyone needs to send me their
$25.00 check for their rec.arts.sf.fandom membership.

And if you send me $500, I'll send you $1000 next week when the
government frees my funds.

xxxxx
Lagos, Nigeria

Just remember that whenever money changes hands, a third of it goes to
me. After all, I'm your official representative. You voted for me,
which makes it official.

Well, okay, not you personally, but the majority of those voting.

Well, okay, the majority of those *allowed* to vote in the election
I'm referring to, which doesn't happen include you. But the criteria
for deciding who was allowed to vote was decided by me, your
democratically-elected representative, so that makes it official.

Oh, and it's also God's will that I be your representative. The head
priest, whom I appointed, assured me that God told him so personally.
Who are you to go against God?

It's also traditional. I've been your representative for decades, as
was my father before me, and his father before him, etc., etc., back
for the past three thousand years. It says so right here in this
history book, written by the historian whom I appointed.

I'm doing an excellent job, which is yet another reason why, whenever
money changes hands, I should get a third of it. Just think of
anything bad. Anything bad whatsoever. If it hasn't happened to you,
that's proof that I'm doing an excellent job. If it *has* happened to
you, that's proof that I need even more money and more power so as to
be able to do an even better job.

It's not like I'm pocketing all the money. I have priests,
historians, bodyguards, election officials, and the guy in
charge of taking the blame when something goes wrong to pay.
--
Keith F. Lynch - http://keithlynch.net/
Please see http://keithlynch.net/email.html before emailing me.
.