Re: military rank question



Thomas Lindgren <***********@*****.***> wrote:

> Mark Atwood <me@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx> writes:
>
> > kaih=9kn11Gkmw-B@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx (Kai Henningsen) writes:
> > > me@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx (Mark Atwood) wrote on 25.12.05 in
<m2u0cx7cwt.fsf@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx>:
> > >
> > >> About the only person who I call "sir" is my father.
> > >
> > > I see that in a number of US-based stories. It grates *a lot*. It's so
> > > 19th century.
> >
> > There are some parts of the 19th century that are worth emulating.
> >
> > Some measure of vocalized respect is one of them.

There are different kinds of politeness. The 19th century used distance
as politeness; we tend to use friendliness as politeness.

If I called my father "sir", he wouldn't think I was being polite, he'd
think I was being facetious and rude.

Nevertheless, I am more distance-polite to my parents than to my
siblings: I call them "Mum" and "Dad", rather than by name; I'm more
likely to say "please" and "would you" than a bare imperative; and I'm
much more restrained in my use of teasing as intimacy.

So I vocalise my respect of them just fine; I just don't do it in the
same way many USans do.

(I don't call anyone "sir"; the only place I ever hear it used in New
Zealand is retail service, and not even much there. I can't bring
myself to use the word without feeling some kind of rude.)

> I do recall hearing that wife and husband in France, at least in the
> upper classes, also were quite formal: "Monsieur" and "Madame" over
> the breakfast table, etc. I've never seen this myself.

Didn't notice this when I did homestay. Oh, but "were" -- certainly in
past centuries, yes. Just as Jane Austen's wives and husbands refer to
their spouses as Mr/Mrs ___.

Zeborah
--
Gravity is no joke.
http://www.geocities.com/zeborahnz/
.



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