Re: military humor received in an email today

On Jul 28, 3:51 am, Strabo <str...@xxxxxxxxxxxxxx> wrote:
hot-ham-and-che...@xxxxxxxxxxx wrote:
On Jul 27, 7:01 am, strabo <str...@xxxxxxxxxxxxxx> wrote:
almostcutmyhairto...@xxxxxxxxx wrote:
Rules for the Non Military...
Dear Civilians, 'We know that the current state of affairs in our
great nation has many civilians up in arms and excited to join the
military.  For those of you who can't join, you can still lend a
hand.  Here are a few of the areas where we would like your
assistance:
1.  The next time you see an adult talking (or wearing a hat) during
the playing of the National Anthem---
kick their ass.
2.  When you witness, firsthand, someone burning the American Flag in
protest---
kick their ass.
3.  Regardless of the rank they held while they served, pay the
highest amount of respect to all veterans.  If you see anyone doing
otherwise, quietly pull them aside and explain how these veterans
fought for the very freedom they bask in every second.  Enlighten them
on the many sacrifices these veterans made to make this Nation great.
Then hold them down while a disabled veteran--
kicks their ass.
4.  GUYS... If you were never in the military, DO NOT pretend that you
were.  Wearing battle dress uniforms (BDUs) or Jungle Fatigues,
telling others that you used to be 'Special Forces,' and collecting GI
Joe memorabilia, might have been okay when you were seven years old.
Now, it will only make you look stupid and get your--
ass kicked.
5.  Next time you come across an Air Force member, do not ask them,
'Do you fly a jet?'  Not everyone in the Air Force is a pilot.  Such
ignorance deserves an--
ass-kicking (children are exempt).
6.  If you witness someone calling the US Coast Guard 'non-military',
inform them of their mistake---
and kick their ass.
7.  Next time Old Glory (the US flag) prances by during a parade, get
on your damn feet and pay homage to her by placing your hand over your
heart .  Quietly thank the military member or veteran lucky enough to
be carrying her---of course, failure to do either of those could earn
you a severe--
ass-kicking.
8.  Don't try to discuss politics with a military member or a
veteran.  We are Americans, and we all bleed the same, regardless of
our party affiliation.  Our Chain of Command is to include our
Commander-In-Chief (CinC).  The President (for those who didn't know)
is our CinC regardless of political party.  We have no inside track on
what happens inside those big important buildings where all those
representatives meet  All we know is that when those civilian
representatives screw up the situation, they call upon the military to
go straighten it out.  If you keep asking us the same stupid questions
repeatedly, you will get your--
ass kicked!
9.  'Your mama wears combat boots' never made sense to me---stop
saying it!  If she did, she would most likely be a vet and therefore,
could--
kick your ass!
10.  Bin Laden and the Taliban are not Communists, so stop saying
'Let's go kill those Commies!'  And stop asking us where he is!
Crystal balls are not standard issue in the military.  That reminds
me---if you see anyone calling those damn psychic phone numbers, let
me know, so I can go--
kick their ass!
11.  'Flyboy' and 'Wingnut' (Air Force), 'Jarhead' (Marines),
'Grunt' (Army), 'Squid' (Navy), 'Puddle Jumpers' (Coast Guard), etc.,
are terms of endearment we use describing each other.  Unless you are
a service member or vet, you have not earned the right to use them.
That could get your--
ass kicked.
12.  Last, but not least, whether or not you become a member of the
military, support our troops and their families.  Every Thanksgiving
and religious holiday that you enjoy with family and friends, please
remember that there are literally thousands of soldiers, sailors,
marines and airmen far from home wishing they could be with their
families.  Thank God for our military and the sacrifices they make
every day.  Without them, our country would get it's--
ass kicked.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------­­----------------------------------
It is the Veteran, not the reporter who has given us the freedom of
the press.
It is the Veteran, not the poet, who has given us the freedom of
speech.
It is the Veteran, not the campus organizer, who gives us the freedom
to demonstrate.
It is the Military who salutes the flag, who serves beneath the flag,
and whose coffin is draped by the flag, who allows the protester to
burn the flag.
(Please pass this on so I won't have to kick your ass!)  :-)
If you can read this, thank a teacher.  If you are reading it in
English, thank a Veteran.

Rules for the "non-military"?  As though there were a difference.

American citizens built the Republic. Sometimes under arms, sometimes
not.  It exists due to the their sacrifices, not the threats of
posers.

Repression, suppression and oppression - that is the message of
bullies.  A little common sense and knowledge of history will go a long
way in counter acting the assaults of overzealous louts

I guess you missed the "humor" part of it all.  That's too bad.  And
in fact, there are different rules for soldiers, sailor and airmen.

See "UCMJ."

Understand that soldiers sailors and airmen give up rights in order to
protect yours.

Understand that 1) the above accurately reflects the military
attitude toward everyone else and 2) I was military.

So who's ass did you want to kick?

And is wanting to kick someone's ass the same as kicking their ass?
.

Relevant Pages

  • Re: military humor received in an email today
    ... kick their ass. ... Next time you come across an Air Force member, do not ask them, ... Next time Old Glory (the US flag) prances by during a parade, ... Quietly thank the military member or veteran lucky enough to ...
    (misc.survivalism)
  • Re: military humor received in an email today
    ... kick their ass. ... Next time you come across an Air Force member, do not ask them, ... Next time Old Glory (the US flag) prances by during a parade, ... Quietly thank the military member or veteran lucky enough to ...
    (misc.survivalism)
  • military humor received in an email today
    ... kick their ass. ... Next time you come across an Air Force member, do not ask them, ... Next time Old Glory (the US flag) prances by during a parade, ... Quietly thank the military member or veteran lucky enough to ...
    (misc.survivalism)
  • Re: military humor received in an email today
    ... kick their ass. ...  Next time you come across an Air Force member, do not ask them, ...  Next time Old Glory (the US flag) prances by during a parade, ...  Quietly thank the military member or veteran lucky enough to ...
    (misc.survivalism)
  • Rules for the Non-Military -- for the 4th of July
    ... nation has many civilians up in arms and excited to join the military. ... playing of the National Anthem - kick their ass. ... 5.Next time you come across an Air Force member, do not ask them, ' Do you ... Quietly thank the military member or veteran lucky enough to be carrying ...
    (alt.religion.christian.roman-catholic)