Europeans Increase Terror Alert

The English are feeling the pinch in relation to recent terrorist
threats and have raised their security level from "Miffed" to "Peeved."
Soon, though, security levels may be raised yet again to "Irritated" or
even "A Bit Cross." Londoners have not been "A Bit Cross" since the blitz
began in 1940 and tea supplies all but ran out. Terrorists have been
re-categorized from "Tiresome" to "A Bloody Nuisance." The last time the
British issued "A Bloody Nuisance" warning level was during the great
fire of 1666.

Also, the French government announced yesterday that it has
raised its terror alert level from "Run" to "Hide." The only two
higher levels in France are "Collaborate" and "Surrender." The rise was
precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed France's white flag
factory, effectively paralyzing the country's military capability.

It's not only the English and French who are on a heightened
level of alert. Italy has increased the alert level from "Shout
Loudly and Excitedly" to "Elaborate Military Posturing." Two more levels
remain: "Ineffective Combat Operations" and "Change Sides."

The Germans also increased their alert state from "Disdainful
Arrogance" to "Dress in Uniform and Sing Marching Songs." They also have
two higher levels: "Invade a Neighbor" and "Lose."

Belgians, on the other hand, are all on holiday as usual, and the
only threat they are worried abou t is NATO pulling out of Brussels.

The Spanish are all excited to see their new submarines ready to
deploy. These beautifully designed subs have glass bottoms so the new
Spanish navy can get a really good look at the old Spanish navy.
.

Relevant Pages

  • Re: OT: Yet another one
    ... fire of 1666. ... not only the English and French that are on a heightened level of alert. ... Spanish navy can get a really good look at the old Spanish navy. ...
    (rec.crafts.textiles.needlework)
  • Threat Levels
    ... have raised their security level from "Miffed" to "Peeved'. ... recent fire that destroyed France's white flag factory, ... Italy has increased the alert level from "shout loudly and ... excitedly" to "elaborate military posturing". ...
    (uk.local.kent)
  • OT: "Security Levels" (Friday humor)
    ... issued was during the great fire in 1666. ... It's not only the French that are on a heightened level of alert. ... excitedly" to "elaborate military posturing". ... The Germans also increased their alert state from "disdainful ...
    (alt.usage.english)
  • Re: sfunny!
    ... Bit Cross." ... effectively paralyzing the country's military capability. ... It's not only the French who are on a heightened level of alert. ... These beautifully designed subs have glass bottoms so the new Spanish navy ...
    (uk.politics.misc)
  • Terror alert level
    ... The British are feeling the pinch in relation to recent terrorist ... Italy has increased the alert level from "shout loudly and excitedly" ... These beautifully designed subs have glass bottoms so the new Spanish Navy ... Their remaining higher alert states are "attack the world" ...
    (uk.rec.waterways)