Re: Boys only

Vickie wrote:
On Jun 27, 9:53 am, "Stephanie" <nothanks.nevergonedoit.com> wrote:
Vickie wrote:
On Jun 26, 11:44 am, meatnub <meat...@xxxxxxxxx> wrote:
On Jun 26, 1:40 pm, Vickie <lilliputianbizz...@xxxxxxxxx> wrote:

Hey all.
Got a problem and not sure what to do.

Our kids' step-grandpa is very close with our son. He and grandma
are wonderful with the kids and it is nice to have them around.
Unfortunately grandpa seems to want to include our son in
everything, but disclude our two girls.

Gee, that sucks. What's up with that??? He should love all his
grandkids equally.

Honestly I think he does love them equally, but he just likes to
spend his time with grandson, only. It is easier, I'm sure.

Recently he asked my son to a baseball game (with fireworks at the
end) and suggested a sleepover. My middle daughter was there to
hear and said that she would love to go too. He kind of hemmed
and hawed and said he would check it out if he could get another
ticket. So far, no word.

I felt really bad for my daughter.

This has been occurring a lot, a lot, a lot, in the last year.

When all 3 children get to go to the grandparents, my son does get
plenty of one on one time with grandpa, where the girls go with
grandma. That makes sense to me, logical in a way, right? But it
is the extra special somethings that come up, where gramps picks
just my son.

Also grandma works, grandpa does not, so time is limitless for
him. Even if grandma didn't work, she might not want all her
down-time eaten up by the rugrats.

So, should I be telling the girls something to smooth things over
and if so what? I really have no clue what to say.
Should I tell grandpa he should really include the girls more or
is it his choice and the girls just need to deal?

Any ideas would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks all,
Vickie

"Hey [name of step-grandpa], you can't visit with [son] unless
[girls names] are included as well."

Simple and straight to the point.

Tell granpa to stop being such a prick about it.

This is not far at all from what I would really *like* to say.
He does leave me holding the bag when he does include my son only,
gets me going, I tell ya.

What do you mean by holding the bag Do you mean you wish you had
some free time to yourself and you see that opportunity missed? Or
you feel like you are left explaining to the girls? If it is the
former, I would recommend separating that issue out in your mind. It
is lovely when grandparents care for kids to give the parents a
break, but it is really not their responsibility. The bigger issue
is the girls' hurt feelings and a general sense of fair play.

The latter.
Explaining when their feelings are hurt.

Vickie


And that is why Ericka's advice is spot on. Best of luck.


.

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