Re: at odds in discipline

Getting her to bed earlier may help. Getting her up 1/2 hour earlier to get
her awake and/or watch TV for a bit to wake her up may help. Get her own
alarm clock and have it wake her up may help. Find out if there is anything
at school that is bothering her. IMO, 5-year-olds have just as many tantrums
as a 3-year-old does. It is a conflicting time for them, especially since
they are going to school every day and expected to do things in school.
Putting clothes out the night before, as does getting everything else ready
the night before helps. Make getting out of bed a game. Set a timer and see
if she can get ready before the timer goes off. Start making breakfast so
that she smells the food and gets hungry. Talk to her and see if she has any
suggestions on the morning routine. She may feel the tension between you and
your husband, so she is acting out from that. She knows that she can play
you and she cannot with your husband. Your daughter can feel the tension and
she probably feels like she doesn't matter since your hubby is there but
absent. You will need to toughen up and not be lenient. Once you are
consistent with your method (may take a few weeks), she will soon learn that
she cannot get away with anything with you. I totally understand your
position, especially when your husband is blaming you and you have no
support. Raise this child as if you were on your own and be consistent with
your methods.
--
Sue (mom to three girls)

"Vickie" <lilliputianbizzare@xxxxxxxxx> wrote in message
news:84d998c0-824e-498c-ac90-b80d87a7c92d@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Hey guys

It has been awhile since I posted.

Anyway I have to say I am way stressed.

My 5 year old daughter is going through some kind of crazy kid phase.
It is doing a number on me and my relationship with my husband.

She is acting up, crying, tantrum throwing. An example would be
getting her to school in the morning. She flips out from the moment I
wake her, telling me that she is not getting up, not going. I wrestle
to get her into her clothes, she refuses to eat breakfast and on it
goes until we are always 5 to 10 minutes late for school.

When I take the "let's discuss it" route, it seems to confuse her even
more and gets worse.

At the moment she had a huge fit taking a bath and is screaming mama
and crying in her room.

My husband blames me for her behaviour. His idea is strict
punishment, which includes yelling at her and ending up scaring the
cr** out of her.

Needless to say, things are a rollercoaster ride right now. And
basically whatever mood the 5 year old is in, directs how my husband
and I will get along during the day.

It is a terrible way to live. The guilt I have for what my daughter
is turning into is overwhelming and I am doubting myself and my
methods every single moment.

I have no idea what to do anymore. I just keep plugging along, but
some days, I just don't know.

I need advice on handling my daughter and discussing things with my
husband.

Thanks,
Vickie


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