Re: What to do when your son tell you he hates you.

In article <1193056344.983049.64150@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx>, Beliavsky
says...

On Oct 22, 7:55 am, Banty <Banty_mem...@xxxxxxxxxxx> wrote:

<snip>

Here's what you do. Self-inoculate yourselves. Designate yourselves the Great
*** and Queen Bitch of the household. When he calls you names and says he
hates you, nod your head(s) and say "yup", and keep right on with whatever you
need to do.

Banty (whose son called her a "bitch" - and answered with "hmmmmm, and that
makes YOU.....?")

Letting your son call you that without a severe punishment makes you a
wimp in my book.

That's an ego thing. A parent shouldn't be playing que-es-mas-macho.

If my children called their mother that, she'd be
justified in slapping them. They ought to be frightened to even think
of saying such a thing. I never dreamed of calling my mother that,
even though like almost all people, there are times when she is
unpleasant.

You never called your mother that because *she* was unpleasant?? Are you
referring to her disciplining you, or (because you say "..like almost all
people") just unpleasantness in general? You seem to be mixing up parenting and
being the adult with a minor child, with adult-adult interaction in general.
Which I think is exactly the problem here - adults taking *personally* what
immature kids say out of anger or to get a reaction. Because they think of what
they'd do or how they'd feel if a neighbor said the same thing. Wrong wrong
wrong.


A boy probably won't show women in general more respect than he shows
his mother. What kind of man do you want to raise?


He'll learn to respect her when she responds from a position of strength as a
calm centered adult. Not by her flipping out over it and getting all
hurt-feelings over it.

Banty

.

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