Re: 4 Year Old Cries Before Pre-School


Ericka Kammerer wrote:
cjra wrote:

I
agree it'll depend on the kid and the parent and the environment -
we're fortunate that we're not in suburban America and frankly, no one
seems to rely on playdates in my 'hood, the kids all just play together
all the time - lots of SAH/WAHPs, lots of kids out playing in
unstructured activities, no problems with social skills or listening to
authority (it's nice to see multiple parents able to interact with
multiple kids not their own, and the kids respond appropriately).

And that will make it more possible for you than
would be the case for many other parents.

If we lived in a different type of environment, without access to other
young families, I'd certainly see preschool as a good outlet and
opportunity for social interaction. But that is partly why we chose to
live where we live.

On the other hand,
where will she go to elementary school? Will it also be
highly unstructured? Or will she be thrown into a kindy
class where the academic expectations are what they used
to be for first grade and where she'll be expected to already
be able to cope with a classroom environment?

Our two options, fortunately, are very in line with our intentions. The
preschool school goes to age 9, and follows a similar philosophy
throughout, with increasing structure applicable to 'regular' school so
that the 9 yr olds enter a typical school with no problems. Our
alternative, the local elementary, is populated by the same people in
our 'hood who have the same philosophy, so the environment somewhat
reflects that - to the extent it is possible. It's to shortly become a
charter school (focus being languages) and go through grade 8- by which
time we hope to have moved to Europe anyway ;-).

Like I said, it has it's place, but I'm not convinced, no matter how
well you argue, that it's so vital.

That said, I do agree - and have seen the studies - that for kids in
disadvantaged situations, pre-K can be vital to school success, as well
as emotional success, so I'd fully support state programs which provide
access to pre-K. I'm just not jumping on the bandwagon to send my kid -
we may, for whatever days work best - or may not, depends on the
circumstances. Call me crazy but I'm really looking forward to being
able to do all those things with my kids. As the younger child (#7 of
8), having other kids around didn't detract, it helped. That's one of
the things I like about DD's daycare now - she's not in a group of
peers but with multiple ages. She's learning loads from the 3 yo. I do
fully agree having access to other kids is good, I'd just like to vary
that by age/social strata/environment (our 'hood is amazingly mixed as
well).

.