Re: Options for bedrooms?

Kathryn wrote:
[re: moving DS to the smaller room]
That was a thought I did have, actually, but I knocked that one off the list... For a couple reasons...
First was that when we moved, DS was NOT wanting to move. He was 4 and a half at the time, his room was always his room, and we really didn't have any time to attempt to adjust and talk to him about moving across the city. WE were given 1 week notice that our transfer application was accepted, and we were offered this place and could take it or leave it, leaving it meant we'd be back on a waiting list for who knows how long, and it would look bad for us, as it could come across as what they offer us wasn't good enough.
I went alone with the kids to view the new place, and first bedroom we walked in was DD's room, and I asked him what he thought of this room. He said he didn't like it because the closet wasn't big enough for his toy box, which he wanted in a closet. He suggested maybe his sister could have this room. We then walked in his room, and he instantly said that he wanted THIS room because he had a big, big closet, said where he wanted his bed. We then, shortly after moving in, painted both the smaller bedrooms - DD's room is a pale pink and pale purple, alternating on each wall, DS's room is dark blue on the bottom, light blue on the top with the border he picked out. I thought change the kids' rooms around, but I don't know how DS would take to that - all of a sudden getting forced out of his room that he picked and kind of decorated to his liking, and his room isn't all that much bigger - just a different shape, and a bit bigger.
DD's room also faces the back yard. DS's faces the front. The activity of other kids isn't in the front, as ahead of our front lawn is another row of houses. The back has a little field, common area, and I think we're the only ones who insist on the kids being in bed at a reasonable time. Yes, I have seen small children - 4, 5, 6 years old - wandering around playing at 10 at night. DS tends to be drawn to his window when there's kids out.

You might be surprised at what he's willing to do
if you're firm about it and find a way to sweeten the pot.
If the medium-sized room can accommodate the two girls,
then it sounds like that's by far the most sensible arrangement.
Figure out what would make swapping rooms a sweet deal for
him and see if you can arrange it. Is there some new
decorating plan he'd enjoy that can be implemented in the
other room? I'm sure you can figure out the window thing
if need be with blackout shades or sound-proofing of some
sort, plus he'll learn to adjust. (After all, you'll just
run into the same problem with the girls down the line.)
I don't think it's unfair to move him if that's
what makes sense for the family. Be positive and upbeat
about it, find a way to sweeten the pot, and just do it.
Obviously, I wouldn't move him if putting the girls in
that room doesn't gain you anything, but if it does, well,
it's certainly no worse for him to move than for the two
of you to squeeze into the smallest room! Even kids can
be a part of helping out by doing what's right for the
family. Nothing wrong with that.

Best wishes,
Ericka
.

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