Re: Am I crazy for wanting another baby so soon?


"Lady Penelope Creighton-Ward" <penelope@xxxxxxxxxxxxxx> wrote in message
news:1148259219.807375.144500@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
My daughter is three and a half months old and I recently got my period
again. My husband and I would love another child and, both being 35
now, we feel we should do it sooner rather than later. By sooner, I
mean start trying already!

Go see a doctor and check up on your overall health. If you've recovered
and things seem fine, then there should be no reason not to try again, if
that is what you are physically - and mentally - prepared for. DS1 was 3
months when we found out we were pg with DS2 - and I had just had an
emergency c-section with DS1. My OB said I was in fine shape - I was also
very, very young (I could almost be a grandma when I'm 35 ;) lol, although
I'm really, really hoping for that to NOT be the case!), physically very fit
(from years of playing soccer and even many years of dancing and tae kwon
do) and although we hadn't really planned it, I did feel very much ready for
it all.

I am back at work part time for a month and will then resume full time.
My Mum who is retired has moved in for six months to help us look
after the baby. After she leaves we plan to put our daughter in
daycare.

How will 2 infants - possibly as close in age as 12-13 months apart - fit in
with work? Not saying this is the case, but is your mom willing and able to
help out with a baby around a year old and also a newborn? Will YOU be able
to cope and deal with 2 babies if your mum isn't available or willing to
help out full time for the first little while? I don't know about the area
that you are in, but here, there's really no childcare available for
newborns. This might play a role with your work plans, or the work plans
for DH.

I've asked around to see what other people's experiences have been like
with having two young children, and I am getting mixed responses.

For me? It's been great. DS1 and DS2 are a year apart in age. DD will be
15 months old when we have this next one. There's a 4 and a half year gap
between DS2 and DD... DS1=6, DS2=5, DD=9 months. I find with the boys, they
have basically a playmate available pretty much any time. Sure, they have
their little spats, but generally, they have always gotten along. They also
have eachother to gang up with on DH and I - and they know it ;)

What's the right way to approach this question? I feel we might do
something rash if I got pregnant while still in this 'babymoon' phase!

For us, something just felt like it was alright. Not necessarily great, but
definitely not bad. It just felt like it was alright, and it turned out to
be just fine. I had no doubts in my mind and I felt no regrets. My one and
only fear with the second was the fear of another C-section, but this was
also my fear for DD, and luckily I escaped both times with a fantastic VBAC.
I really don't know what the right way to approach it would be. I think if
it feels right to you, and even him, talk it over. I know that one definite
bonus is that you don't have to worry about going out and rounding up more
baby stuff - you should pretty much still have it all, some may very well be
still in use and will not be used for the first when a second comes around.
A playmate as well - or you could just as easily have WWIII on your hands,
but I've seen this to happen (both ways) with siblings close in age as often
as further apart in age, a pair of brothers, pair of sisters or one of
each...
I have a girl friend who's daughter was 8 years old when she had her son -
friend said that it was basically like being pg for the first time, only she
wasn't 19 anymore. She also just found out she's expecting #3 (some time
mid-Jan, she figures) and at this point, her daughter will be almost 10, son
will be about 16 months old. There's pros and cons with EVERYTHING when it
comes to siblings... Maybe sit down and figure a list out of both pros and
cons that suit you and your family? (by family I guess I mean more you, DH
and DD, moreso than the extended family like the grandparents, aunts,
uncles, etc.)


.

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