Re: snappy comeback needed (venting, too)

cailleach@xxxxxxxxxxxxx wrote:
> Nikki wrote:
>
>> If the next meeting is
>> like that I may contact a couple parents to see if they have any
>> ideas on how to make the meetings go smoother because it is driving
>> me crazy
>
> Some suggestions, from a parent of a child with behaviour issues and a
> lot of experience in *seeing* groups but none *running* them.... so
> take with usual Usenet warnings :-)
>
> 1. Set up a routine! Plan it out, and keep to it, week by week.
> 2. Start the routine off with some physical but organised activities -
> some clapping songs maybe. Then settle down to something quieter or
> more crafty. If you have a lot of very physical kids, increase the
> amount of physical activity and downplay the seated stuff, at least to
> begin with. Keep the seated sessions short. Simon Says was a good idea
> - try musical statues, I'm sure there are lots of other games too!
> 3. Don't expect things to calm down immediately. It'll take a few
> weeks to settle the children in.
> 4. Try to have specific parents in charge of the group for specific
> activities, same parents each week. That's better than having no-one
> in charge, or having a different person each week in charge of a whole
> meeting.
>
> You may not be able to get the climbing child to come down, but (with
> luck) this should help the other kids to be less distracted by him. If
> he's ignored while the other children are getting on then he may be
> able to calm down and join in, at least some of the time.
>
> These static yet unstructured social settings can be very difficult
> for children with even mild behaviour or attention problems. To the
> child, they seem unpredictable and overwhelming and demanding, yet
> very exciting, so you get the uncontrollable rushing about in
> response. A regular structure makes it easier for them to predict and
> cope, while moving about lets them release the stress so that they
> may be able to sit more calmly afterwards.
>
> My husband had been fondly thinking of Cubs or similar as something we
> could beneficially get my son involved in, but from what you and Banty
> are saying it could be disastrous!
>
> Good luck,
>
> Cailleach

Thank you for all the tips!

So far Hunter loves it. I think the busy boy loves it too :-) He did a lot
better in the smaller room fwiw. In Tiger Cubs there is no den leader or
anything so we are all still trying to figure out what we are supposed to be
doing :-) We take turns with the meetings etc. I would assume that once
we figure it out (and next year when there is an actual leader) that things
will smooth out a bit. It bothers me more then it ordinarily would because
the meetings are in a church basement where the sound bounces all over the
place, even with small groups. If you aren't sitting right next to someone
you can't hear them. Certain types of auditory things drive me nuts and
that is one of them. It is also a very big place and that invites running
amuck :-) I might actually volunteer to have the meeting I do at my house
and see if it works out any better. I can enlist my dh to help with some
kind of activity to keep them a bit more focused, yet active, during the
beginning and ending times. I'll have to put some thought into it and
hopefully it will go well and be an example!

I'm very new at this so take this with a grain of salt but I think cub
scouts is actually a very good choice for any busy kid or kid with
behavioral quirks. It is about having fun, the activities change, it isn't
competitive, the boys get to bond, it focuses on positive character traits,
etc. etc. We've also had one activity since this post. We all toured the
police department. All the boys absolutely loved it and every single one
behaved absolutely spectacularly.


--
Nikki
Hunter 4/99
Luke 4/01
EDD 4/06


.

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