Re: snappy comeback needed (venting, too)

Nikki wrote:

>If the next meeting is
>like that I may contact a couple parents to see if they have any ideas on
>how to make the meetings go smoother because it is driving me crazy

Some suggestions, from a parent of a child with behaviour issues and a
lot of experience in *seeing* groups but none *running* them.... so
take with usual Usenet warnings :-)

1. Set up a routine! Plan it out, and keep to it, week by week.
2. Start the routine off with some physical but organised activities -
some clapping songs maybe. Then settle down to something quieter or
more crafty. If you have a lot of very physical kids, increase the
amount of physical activity and downplay the seated stuff, at least to
begin with. Keep the seated sessions short. Simon Says was a good idea
- try musical statues, I'm sure there are lots of other games too!
3. Don't expect things to calm down immediately. It'll take a few weeks
to settle the children in.
4. Try to have specific parents in charge of the group for specific
activities, same parents each week. That's better than having no-one in
charge, or having a different person each week in charge of a whole
meeting.

You may not be able to get the climbing child to come down, but (with
luck) this should help the other kids to be less distracted by him. If
he's ignored while the other children are getting on then he may be
able to calm down and join in, at least some of the time.

These static yet unstructured social settings can be very difficult for
children with even mild behaviour or attention problems. To the child,
they seem unpredictable and overwhelming and demanding, yet very
exciting, so you get the uncontrollable rushing about in response. A
regular structure makes it easier for them to predict and cope, while
moving about lets them release the stress so that they may be able to
sit more calmly afterwards.

My husband had been fondly thinking of Cubs or similar as something we
could beneficially get my son involved in, but from what you and Banty
are saying it could be disastrous!

Good luck,

Cailleach

Nikki wrote:
> Ericka Kammerer wrote:
>
> > As far as the running around at pack meetings
> > goes, that's a similar situation. It only takes *one*
> > family who doesn't care about maintaining discipline
> > and lets their kid run around, and then all the other
> > kids (and many of the parents) start to believe that
> > it's okay. And even those parents who don't believe
> > it's okay won't be very successful corralling their
> > kids when they can see all the other kids running
> > around.
>
> I can relate to that!! I'm not a good enough parent that I can ever get my
> kids to sit quietly with their hands folded in their lap like Banty did as a
> kid but I usually manage a bit better then I do at pack meetings. There was
> one parent whose kid ran wild, litterally climbing the support beams and
> tables nearly the whole time. I suspect that kid has something going on.
> He's smart and polite when he actually sits down. The mom did most of the
> project without batting an eye. It was *hell* to try and get my kid to sit
> at the table. I had more trouble because I've had to bring Luke with me
> these last two months but dh has a new shift now and I can leave him at home
> which will help. One parent was able to keep their kid seated, one did a
> fairly good job (she is a good mom and has a good kid - he is a year older
> then Hunter though and I think that makes a difference) and the rest of us
> threw up our hands. I chased mine down, took them out, scolded and finally
> gave up. Trying to get mine to sit down when 5 of them were running like
> wild animals was just not something I could manage. If the next meeting is
> like that I may contact a couple parents to see if they have any ideas on
> how to make the meetings go smoother because it is driving me crazy. For
> one a smaller room would be nicer. I also think we need more activity in
> our projects but we each take turns. It hasn't been mine yet but I'll
> probably be back for some helpful hints :-) I tried to get a game of Simon
> Says going spur of the moment last time so they could be active before the
> meeting offically started without being crazy. Only one parent helped me
> try to corrall the kids and he was pretty hands off. It was his first
> meeting and I think he was a bit horrified ;-)
>
> Sorry - that turned into my own little rant :-0
>
> --
> Nikki
> Hunter 4/99
> Luke 4/01
> EDD 4/06

.

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