Re: Explaining sister's divorce to my boys


"annie" <annesmithjunkmail@xxxxxxxxx> wrote in message
news:1130261374.068923.168050@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
>
> Banty wrote:
>> Given that info, I'd say leave the subject alone unless the boys are
>> particularly close to their cousins. If they are, all you need say is
>> that
>> "Uncle XX doesn't live with them anymore."
>
> I guess what I'm really after his how to answer the question that will
> follow. "Why?" They certainly do not need to know all the details,
> but I think I need to be able to provide some answer and I'm having a
> hard time coming up with the right words.

At ages seven and nine, they certainly must have classmates or friends who's
parents are divorced! My brother is divorced and remarried. My kids think
it's cool that their cousins have two houses, an extra mom (my brothers 2nd
wife) and two new siblings. ( I envy the kid-free time that my brother has
when all the kids are at their other parents' houses, but I'm not getting a
divorce to get that too).

>>I don't know if I'd say we talk about it a lot, but we do make comments
>about how lucky they are to have both a Mommy and a Daddy to take care
>of them and how DH and I need each other.

Be careful not to put the idea in their heads that children of divorced
families are "poor unfortunates" . It is a major disruption, but it's not
the end of the world and most kids end up just fine.

>>A young mother in our
>neighborhood was recently killed in a car accident and they were both
devasted to think about her children not having a Mommy anymore. They
immediately put themselves in the other kids' shoes.


Well this might be a good time to talk about death, too.



.

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