Re: Homework (poll)


Nan wrote:
> For those of you with children old enough to be assigned homework, or
> have had homework in the past:
>
> How do/did you handle the issue of homework..... ie. requiring it be
> done immediately after school, etc. Why did you choose this method,
> and if you changed methods, why?

My DD's are in 6th and 7th grade now. In our school district, they
assign homework as early as K. In K, parents get involved, but by grade
3, all we're supposed to do is sign off. By 5th, we're not even
supposed to do that. We are preached to over and over again that
homework is the child's responsibility, not the parent's. The children
are expected by 5th to be 100% responsible for their own homework
management with no parental involvement. This prepares them for middle
school.

How that worked in reality...

We struggled initially with DD#1 in K. Homework was a real onerous
chore, taking hours each night, and with us both ending up in tears.
Then the teacher told me to stop getting involved. She suggested I set
up a space in the kitchen for DD to work while I cooked dinner, to
merely set a timer for 15 minutes, have DD sit down to her homework,
and keep myself occupied so I didn't feel compelled to hover over her.
Whatever DD got done in 15 minutes, was it. Even if that was just a
single problem or none at all.. The teacher explained that this would
enable her to gauge DD's progress.

So since an early age, I've cont'd the same "hands-off, nose-out"
method with both girls. By 4th grade, DD#1 was soaring on her own, she
has developed very good homework habits and chooses to tackle her
homework first, before going on to other activities at afterschool, and
tends to tackle all the challenge problems too. She is very organized
and has a whole routine. She's also getting straight A's.

DD#2 is more apt to prefer to play with friends first, and then later,
in the 11th hour, whip through her homework (either while I'm cooking
dinner, before bed, or in the early AM), putting in just enough effort
not to draw attention to the quality of her work and never attempting
any challenge or extra credit problems. I have resisted the urge to nag
her to put more effort into it.

Instead I find it's more helpful to choose my moment, when she's
disappointed with her test results or grades. Then I suggest that that
she might try a different tactic and put in more effort *before*
playing. Or team up with friends to study together and combine both. Or
whatever. But I coach and suggest, I don't nag.

DD#2 is now in middle school, and it seems her habits have changed
overnight. She's taking middle school far more seriously than she did
grade school. I think it helps that she is excited and challenged by
her teachers. She really likes changing subjects and teachers every
hour. Her new routine is to sit down immediately at afterschool,
alongside her sister, and tackle her homework before playing. Both have
their homework done long before the time I pick them up. They may only
ask me to quiz them later after dinner.

Except for the other night - DD#2 asked me for help with a challenge
problem! I was impressed she was actually bothering to try and tackle
it.

jen

.

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