Re: This newsgroup

MsLiz wrote:

While people need to develop thicker skins (in this particular group),
perhaps the converse is true as well: people can state their opinion
(and of course should use some sensitivity) however, respondents can
also lighten up a bit.  There just seems to be a lot of anger in
here...people ready to jump on you when you state your opinion.


	Hmm...perhaps you don't mean it, but I sense a
certain amount of anger in your postings as well.  Again,
I'm not sure you mean it that way, but it comes across
that way to me sometimes, and I'm not the sort of person
who particularly cares one way or another about that sort
of thing (i.e., it's not a hot button for me).

In real life, I have, on many occassions been judged for raising my
daughter vegan.  I've been questioned, challenged, debated and had to
defend why I chose a vegan lifestyle.  It appalled me...why did it
bother people how I ate?  Why did it bother people how I fed my child?
It's all about choices.  If I find fast food for toddlers distasteful,
why is it not okay to state that?  I did not tell others to eat vegan
or organic food unless I was asked about it.


	We all have areas like that where our choices are
not necessarily mainstream.  I've not infrequently encountered
a lot of flak for birthing at home, including very thinly veiled
accusations that I was risking my babies' lives.  Nevertheless
I believe strongly in the superiority of homebirth FOR ME in
MY SITUATION.  That still doesn't make me berate others for
choosing hospital birth, even when I think it's a mistake,
and I attempt to avoid incendiary language.  When I get
frustrated and cross the line, people call me on it--and
they should.  I don't have the right to judge others'
situations, no matter how much I think I know about it.
When you dish it out, you have to be prepared to take it.
As vehemently as you express your opinions (and using
words like "sickening" to describe kids eating fast food
is pretty vehement), that's precisely how vehement the
reactions are likely to be in return.  You can be mouselike
and refrain from stating strong opinions, or you can state
stronger opinions, but be prepared to get stronger reactions.
It's just the way it goes.

That's a stretch to say that the parent is abusive if they feed them
potato chiops and a very far stretch when my original statement was
MERELY that I wish that schools dictated more what could or could not
be brought to school.  It started with that (attacks where I felt I had
to defend my wish!)  It escalated.


	I think that you are just as guilty of seeing personal
attacks where they weren't intended (just because people disagree
with you about the level of control schools should exert over
students' eating does *NOT* mean they're personally attacking
you--heck, they might even agree with you on what foods are
better or worse and simply disagree that it should be the
school's role to enforce that) as you are claiming others
have been in seeing personal attacks in your statements.
You can't escalate an argument without two people working
at it ;-)

Best wishes,
Ericka
.

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