Re: BG and depression

First of all I hope this makes sense as threading discussion is still
semi-foreign to me.

Thanks for all of the great responses it helps much more than I thought
it would. In response to some of the questions I would say that I have
been to my primary care physician and he scribed me a few SRRI's
(zoloft,lexapro,strattera) to which my only response was almost every
side effect but he finally told me to find psychiatrist. I finally
found one (I live in a small Texas town) and he prescribed wellbutrin
(gen. bupropian) which helped for almost a month until I started
noticing extreme bouts of nearly uncontrollable rage. This suprised me
(and those around unfortunately) so I went back and he said "Oh, you
must be bi-polar. This is sometimes an unfortunate side effect." So he
changed to the long acting wellbutrin (xl or sr I tried both) and after
two weeks of so-so results it has kind of petered out. The depression
is no where near as bad and at least I can say that I get out of bed.
Also my gym attendance has been great for a month after nearly a year
and a half m.i.a.. He also wrote me a scribe for desipramin but I
researched it and found the side effects are above and beyond other
meds so unless I hit more dire straits I will leave that one alone.

1
I suggest you discuss this with your doctor. I'm more familiar with
newly diagnosed diabetics (or at times people with diabetes for longer
periods) suffering depression that shows as a "I want to be normal"
thus skipping bg tests, meds or properly choosen meals.

On binge eating I must say that the wellbutrin has almost entirely
ended that bad habit. The side effect (loss of appetite) helped me
lose in 2 months what I had gained in the previous year of not quite
perfect living.

2
*HUMANS* suffer from severe depression, not just diabetics. It's
certainly
possible to have separate problems, especially ones that feed into each

other and make one or both of them trickier to manage, like diabetes
and
depressions.


This is true. The depression is inherited from my mother's side of
the family where several members have had nervous breakdowns,
depression, etc. The bi-polar is from my dad's side no doubt. (As a
side note) In doing family history research some years back I found
that for the past 700 years multiple members of his long ago ancestors
where hanged, murdered and jailed and the justification was usually
written "severely foul tempered."
True again is the fact that diabetes exacerbates almost every illness
be it mental or physical.

3
It's a matter of control. For many years, I felt completely out of
control with my dm. Then realized that I needed to take care of
myself.
I find I still resent it though. And this is why, every now and then,
I
have to negotiate the gym, negotiate eating the right thing, negotiate
taking the blood sugars,
etc., etc., etc. I know it's all good for me to do. That doesn't
matter.

Even though it gets worse left unattended I sometimes just want to put
by head under the covers and dream sugar laced fantasies (or nightmares
if the BG drops.) I have fortunately gone through the phases of
denial and exceptance but have never completely conquered that battle
and I guess to some small degree never will.
What angers me is the depression just takes away all feelings of self
worth and generally has nothing to
do with the (I am a diabetic feel sorry for me) mood to which I am
truly thankful left me years ago.


4
When you get depressed again, pat yourself on the back and tell
yourself--"I made it to the gym. That's one victory for me, one small
defeat for diabetes." And tell yourself that every time you make the
right choice in all of the other areas of life.

You are exactly right. It is often tough to get out of the "I just
climbed a small hill only to find Mt. Everest on the other side"
frame of mind. Just gotta keep tallying the small victories and
climbing the small hills and I suppose admire the nature of the Mt.
Everest in the distance.

5
Yuck! That was 11 years ago. What happened to you on being diagnosed?

How did your 13th birthday party go?

Get this. I began to feel washed out and lethargic around the middle
of Sept. of that year. After a few worsening weeks my mother in her
"I know my child is sick even if no one else does" diligence
brought me to my then primary Dr. on multiple occasions and wanted to
know what was wrong with me to which he told her she was being "over
protective" and needlessly worrying. After two weeks and no results
(He didn't even draw a single vial of blood) my symptoms began were
beginning to manifest themselves in more pronounced ways. With a
twelve pack of root beer in a morning polished off with almost a gallon
of Gatorade by evening and another gallon of water as an all through
the night cap coupled with (no lie) over two gallons of urine in less
than a day my mom was running mad trying to deal with the bone head doc
and finding a specialist. We at that time unfortunately had no prior
history with close family and friends who could've diagnosed me in an
instant. We finally found a specialist who was not and endocrinologist
but was intelligent enough to run a blood test and within three days I
was in the hospital with a bg of over 800 and fearing the now all to
familiar needles. By the time they had admitted me I had lost forty
pounds in less than two weeks; that was when I imagine my pancreas
completely gave up the ghost. Just thinking about all the sugar I
drank at first makes my bg rise. What kept me out of coma in the end
was the forsaking of all things except gallons and gallons of water in
the few days leading up to the diagnosis.
As far as my birthday goes I didn't get many gifts (not that I ever
did or have mind you) because by that time I had about tapped my mother
and father dry (Thank God for insurance). I did however get probably
my best gift ever a gift that my mother obtained free. She called a
radio station (WOAI 1200 AM) in San Antonio, Texas (100 miles from my
house) and explained to them what I had been going through and they
ended up giving me an autographed cap by my favorite sports player of
all time David Robinson of the San Antonio Spurs. Looking back on it
now I realize that I had it better than most and am extremely thankful
for those that drraaaaged me through it.

6

Next thing to try is get direct treatment for the depression. Don't
wonder about this, just do it! (Yes, I've been there too, with a
substantial amount of (successful) psychotherapy behind me.)

Yes I am going to keep plugging away at it (a Texas term y'all heh)
and I think that more talk like this helps a lot. You guys are great
and I dare say better not to mention cheaper than talk therapy. Thanks
for the great replies and I am definitely going to be surfing these
boards as often as possible to help and be helped.
Thanks again for everything and yes it is hot here in TX. I am
sweating inside even with the a/c as I type.

P.S. A great treatment (not a cure unfortunately) is a great
girlfriend. P.P.S. Please pardon my rambling as I aspire to be a
writer. Godspeed and I look forward to many more great discussions.
(I feel as though I have been talking from a therapy couch.)

.

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