standing up tall and strong

after a freak out last night I had two choices runaway and put my quit in jeopardy so the trolls can have their playground or stay and stand up for who I am. My quit is worth to annoy some people along the road. I am determined to remain quit this time. Even if it means crying and some tough love sometimes.. Who ever doesn't like me or feels that I am the cause of their smoking urges can kill file me.
Maybe so that I failed several times in the past and it may look to some people like quitting is impossible but all anyone has to do is look at the people who did succeed and remain smoke free for many years to know quitting is possible and not just an illusion.

thanks to friends I realized that it shouldn't be me leaving. I belong here, its here where I feel home and safe. A place where not only I learn to stay smoke free and deal with life in different ways but also a place where I made many friends I can turn to and laugh and cry. Its here where I learned to value friendship and know what carrying for each other means. Beside I can't just disappear I have a quit body to watch over and make sure she stays on our journey to a smoke free life. I know we are both committed and will succeed this time. I let a quit body down ones and wasn't there for her when she needed me the most. I am not going to make that mistake again.

this semester is finally over and I have exams all next week. I am a little bit concerned as it is a lot of stress and no means of smoking to calm down. But I know I can and will do this. I will get through the exams without smoking. Learning new copying skills is more important than falling back into the old habit. So I maybe just be a little bit more bitchy and whine a lot.

SteveS: radio check , got shot and injured last night and wanted to surrender to the enemy but I was to scarred to return to head quarters and be RTU. I will remain on the front line and fight the enemy. I managed to kill file some obstacles so I will not get shot again. I know I am stronger than the enemy is, I just must not let them see where my weak points are and keep truck of physical strength so I want loose sight of my goal. no reinforcement needed at this time radio check over.
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PolarBear
Rocker2004
"Failing to prepare is preparing to fail" I will not fail.
I will prove that Bipolars can stay quit too


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