Re: I will have to get back in a little while

Bill, you are only at 27 days, hun. Your brain will be back soon and
everything will get accomplished. In the meantime, just do what absolutely
positively needs to be done, when you get a lil energy. Take it easy on
yourself. A wonderful lady here named Maude used to always say "Be patient.
You are recovering from a fatal addiction. Give yourself time to heal."

Cat

"Wrong Attitude" <mr.correct@xxxxxxxxxxx> wrote in message
news:iaSdnQL3ZprzN8zZRVn-og@xxxxxxxxxxxxxx
I am not so spaced out recently and so I am able to concentrate a little
better on some things that need doing. But I must be careful to keep a
few
important facts in sight and look for an opportunity to get back to them
soon. One of those important things is for me to realize and keep in mind
that there's actually not much that 'needs doing'. For me it will
probably
be best to be in a 'spaced out' state of mind. quite a lot. What I've
learned to think of as sensible, practical and sane is actually contorted
and alien, and I make a serious mistake if I evaluate or judge myself by
those ideas. And having spent most of my life laboring under those
concepts
of sensible, practical and sane, having learned in those terms most of
everything I ever learned, I readily slip into the familiar rut of
judgement
and self criticism - which I really don't need any more of at all.

But right now for a while I really need to concentrate on some practical
things that need doing now. Soon I will be to a point where I can cut
back
on that crap about 95%. That's where I belong- happily nowhere and with
nothing. And I will make a big mistake if I don't get myself there soon.
I'm not saying you are bad or that your world is bad - but it is poison
for
me. So much of human interaction now just feels like I'm swimming in a
sewer. And I have to get myself free of it as soon as possible. I mean
not participate, not compete - become irrelevant. Who knows how much
time
I have left to live? Maybe not much. I was a fool not to realize this
years ago. Now maybe the time is all used up.

What's that got to do with not smoking? It is often a struggle for me to
get practical things done without smoking cigarettes. Right now I have to
spend some time on an unfinished remodeling job so I can sell my house -
soon. I have to replace a stairway up to the second floor. And some
other
stuff. Then I'm going to live on the street, probably not live to be all
that much older, but it will be quality time.

Popping in and out between states of mind. I'm getting too old for it.

Bill S. 27 days smoke free. Thanks to my friends in AS3.




.

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