Yeehaw! I've made the tubs. Feels great! That Rauol is such a nice
man, and I've never experienced such lush towels! The best part is
that when I get out I don't have to worry about my fingers being wet.
This past year has been amazing. I quit smoking. I don't smoke. 366
days ago I would have laughed at anyone suggesting that I could
successfully stop slowly killing myself. I always said you could take
that last cigarette from me by prying it out of my cold dead fingers.
Thank goodness it never came to that! :-)
In the past 365 days: I smoked my last cigarette ever. I've had a
colonoscopy, an endoscopy, two angiograms, one angioplasty, laser
surgery on both eyes and I've started a daily regimen of prescription
pills that will last the rest of my life. My elderly mother (already
frail from emphysema) fell June 18 and for the next month my family
and I got to watch her fade away as she fought for every breath. She
passed away July 17, a mere whisper of the robust woman she'd been not
so long before.
In the past 365 days I've also learned that each day brings its own
rewards. I've learned what it feels like to have my only child be
really proud of me for quitting smoking. I've learned how good it
feels to be proud of myself for doing something I had been convinced
was impossible. I'm learning I will never again have to live my life
around when I can step outside for a few minutes. I've learned that
my car *really will* run without being filled with smoke. I could cry
when I think about the amount of money I sent up in smoke over so many
years, but am quite happy now to go on the occasional spending spree
with money I didn't burn up.
I've learned how good it feels to walk through security at the airport
and not having a single worry about when I'll be able to get outside
again. I've learned that I don't have to worry about making sure I've
got enough supplies in for the weekend, especially when the roads are
covered with snow and ice.
I started to smoke during a time when it was acceptable. My parents
never encouraged me to smoke, but when they learned that I'd started
their only comment was, "don't burn down the house, please." The only
good thing I can think of about me smoking is that it made my son dead
set against ever lighting up.
The main things that's gotten me this far is my commitment to never
pick up another stink stick again. I know I'm an addict and I can
never have 'just one.' I can't think of a single reason that could
ever justify me busting this quit. I made a half-assed attempt to
quit about a dozen years ago, but I consider this my first, only and
last quit.
Backing up that commitment is the support I've gotten from AS3. I
honestly don't know if I'd still be quit if I hadn't found this group.
I've spent many many hours here, sometimes just repeatedly hitting the
'refresh messsages' button hoping there would be at least a few new
messages!
From the very bottom of my healthier heart (and pinker lungs) I want
to thank each and every person here who offered support when I needed
it, scorn when I needed it, a learning experience when I needed it,
and sometimes just an ear when I needed it. With everyone's support,
and my own commitment, I made it here one day at a time. Now I can
look forward to being a non-smoker one year at a time.
THANK YOU AS3!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
BessieBee
Lookie: ---> I quit smoking One year, 11 hours, 17 minutes and 28
seconds. I quit smoking September 29, 2004 at 3:00PM EST. Since then
I have not smoked 21928 cigarettes, saving $2,576.56. Life saved: 10
weeks, 6 days, 3 hours, 20 minutes. AND, I no longer stink! :-)
---
OF Damnit! :-)
