Re: I'm about to crack!
- From: "Julie Bove" <juliebove@xxxxxxxxxxxx>
- Date: Fri, 2 Sep 2011 07:10:15 -0700
"Ozgirl" <are_we_there_yet@xxxxxxxxxx> wrote in message
"Julie Bove" <juliebove@xxxxxxxxxxxx> wrote in message
Apparently I do not handle stress very well. I just have too much of it
and I want to just flee somewhere. I don't know where.
It started with my husband who is coming home but he keeps changing the
date when he is coming here. With school starting, Angela now being in
physical therapy and dance starting I need to plan things out very
carefully at least until we get into the swing of the new schedule. We
are also trying to plan my husband's birthday party. Come to find out the
place where we were going to have it, a place where he always whined that
he couldn't go is now a place he doesn't want to go. I don't know the
particulars on that. He spoke to my dad about it. I've already had to
changed the date of the party and now even that is up in the air. And
husband keeps calling me. He only has a cell phone and it keeps cutting
Angela has a ton of papers I need to fill out for school and also needs
help with her homework. And she is stressing out too and having
Yesterday I bought a 3 pound pack of ground beef at Costco without
checking the dates. It took me longer than I had hoped to get the food
put away because I had to clean out the fridge. Somebody had spilled
something sticky on two shelves and there was food that was old and/or
spoiled or just not acceptable. As in stuff Angela or my husband used to
eat but can't now. Apparently he has changed his diet too which is partly
why I had to go shopping.
So when I got to the beef to cook dinner I realized it had expired on the
26th. No doubt about it based on the smell, it was bad. So $17 down the
drain. I had saved over $18 at Target using coupons. Yes, I know Costco
will take it back but... It's clear in Woodinville and I already had to
make too many trips out there including one to replace my cell phone
which wouldn't hold a charge for long. So I didn't want to drive clear
back out there plus I was uncertain that I would get there before they
closed. And yes I know I could technically go there today or tomorrow
but we already had full plates. So I just tossed it. Went to Central
Market and bought more.
I planned to make Spanish rice tonight using very little rice and a lot
of meat and veg. Was going to make extra so that if we were not home
tomorrow, husband would have something to eat. Which I now know was a
stupid plan because now he's *not* going to be here tomorrow. Gah!
So I cooked all the veggies and meat, toasted the rice to perfection and
added (without looking) a jar of salsa from the fridge. I immediately
smelled mold. It was bad. Mold inside the cap. Foolishly I thought if I
just scooped out all the salsa (it wasn't a lot) and some of the food
around it, it would be safe. Somehow I just thought the mold was only on
the cap. But the scent of mold filled my nostrils. And sure enough there
was a nasty hard chunk of something with mold on it in the pan. So...
Threw all that out! Thankfully for some unknown reason, I bought twice
as many veggies as I needed. So I ran up to the health food store around
the corner for more meat and salsa. The end result is not how I wanted
it. I had wanted to put in chicken broth but they don't sell it in small
quantities and I only have the large boxes. But we have dinner.
And to top it all off, my dad had a stroke last night (I think). My mom,
brother and SIL have been at the hospital all day. He is not in the
local hospital but one in downtown Seattle because he had bleeding in the
brain. My mom said it is not a clot and his speech and motor skills are
not affected. But AFAIK he is still in ICU. Which is part of the reason
Angela is having meltdowns. She really wants to see him but we were told
not to come tonight.
My mom wants me to take her there early tomorrow but I won't know the
details until she gets home. Not sure how we will work that out because
my mom will want to stay there till closing time, I'm sure and I have to
get back here to take Angela to physical therapy.
On the plus side, my BG was 183 before dinner. Too high, I know but I
had expected much higher after the delayed dinner and all this stress. It
has been mostly running from the high 200's to high 300's. I did have a
161 before dinner two days ago which amazed me because I ate not only the
falafel and cheese I had packed but a few of Angela's apple slices.
So now I guess I just sit and wait for someone to call me with more news.
You know what? 99% of what you are stressing over needs to be put on the
back burner. Your dad first, forget trying to organise a birthday party
right now. He's an adult and if he doesn't understand what has to come
before that well.... anyway. Homework, school forms, dancing, dead meat,
sticky fridge shelves, not one of those things are important. And I would
have bought takeaway.... :) But seriously, certain things in life
over-ride all else. Do yourself a favour and think only about your father
right now and while you are waiting sit quietly and maybe fill out some of
the school forms. And if the school whines about homework tell them why it
didn't happen. I would rip the head off any teacher who didn't understand
that a serious medical emergency takes priority. And if you have to leave
your mum while you take Angela to physical therapy and go back for her
then so be it (IMO). Life throws this BS at us sometimes. Just go with it.
Maybe your school works that way but ours does not. Angela almost flunked
out last year from her injuries and illness and being sick. There is no
excuse for late homework as it said on the papers that I signed yesterday.
I also don't fancy going to jail which is what can happen to a parent here
if a child misses too much school or flunks out. And now to top it all off
I think I am getting an ear infection. I can't see a regular Dr. for that.
I have to see an ENT and it can be hard to get in.
I also don't think you understand. He is not in a local hospital. It's not
like I can just go there I can't! There is simply no way I could possibly
make that trip twice in one day. Or get back there in time after her PT.
My mom realized that wouldn't work so she is taking a cab. She will have to
stay there until my brother gets home from work.
Right now I am having extreme body cramping and I don't know why. The backs
of both legs are involved and also all across my stomach clear up into my
rib cage. Being in any one position for any length of time causes extreme
pain. I don't see how I could drive to Seattle in this condition.
Hopefully that will resolve by tomorrow.
Hopefully my husband will home tomorrow. He can easily make that drive. I
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