Re: Diabetes and Alcohol

In article <19_An.368927$vr1.19990@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx>,
Michael <micoder@xxxxxxxxxxxxx> wrote:

I have a question about alcoholism for which you may have some thoughts.
Most of my friends are gay. There seems to be an abnormally high
incidence of alcoholism among them. In fact, most of my friends are
recovering alcoholics and a few out of control alcoholics.

I am just talking about my own experiences. I am not saying that from
just my own experiences that alcoholism is higher among all homosexuals.
It is just that my own experience has shown this.

I wonder what you have experienced in this area.

You may recall my talking about being born with the genetic propensity
for alcoholism and then the details of my life activating that
potential. What better set-up is there to feel lousy about yourself and
feel like you need to escape your feelings than to have an important
aspect of yourself labeled as not just offensive but outright evil and
disgusting by a large portion of the society in which one is growing up?
Those of us who have the genes lying dormant may find them activated by
this.

So, if we live through adolescence (the incidence of suicide among GLBT
teenagers is abysmally high), chances are decent we may find we want to
dull our feelings as adults. That's unless we're really lucky and are
born with excellent genes and/or supportive accepting adults. Sometimes
all it takes is one supportive adult to keep a queer kid alive.

Similar situation with childhood abuse. A very high percentage of women
who are recovering alcoholics are survivors of childhood abuse, often
(usually?) sexual abuse. I would guess the same is true of men who are
in recovery, but that's not been quoted to me.

The "perfect" recipe for an alcoholic is to be born with the genes and
then have experiences ("preferably" ongoing unrelenting experiences)
which tell you that you're unloveable or disgusting or vile or worthless
and not have anyone telling you different in ways you can understand.

On top of that, some people (including myself) believe that AA works
best for people who closely resemble the founders, Bill W. and Dr. Bob.
They were straight, white, men. Thus GLBT folks, people of color, and
women are not as likely to find the Program speaks to them. AA is the
pre-eminent recovery program for people with alcoholism. It has really
been only in the past 20-25 years that alternatives have gained any
acceptance. I stayed in AA for 11 years, but after I left I realized
that, while the first five years had been crucial for me, after that it
became more counter-productive than helpful. I had no ego when I got
sober, and all the talk about corralling my ego and so on was less than
helpful to someone who needed to develop one. Many women and survivors
of abuse may find themselves in similar positions. But those first five
years *were* essential. One day at a time. First things first. Easy
does it. You're not alone. Etc.

The other thing about alcoholism I found is that I like being around
recovering alcoholics. They have a self awareness that I like. I think
going through alcoholism and recovering via AA may change a person in
ways that are actually good.

It requires that we do internal work that not everyone does. Without
getting to know our insides and changing ourselves, we can't stay sober.
That's what 12 step programs are all about, and many people in recovery
also get into therapy, which I think is vital. I don't like to spend a
lot of time with people who haven't put some serious effort into
internal work. *Everyone* has work to do. Not everyone is pushed into
doing it.

Of course I am not recommending trying to become an alcoholic to better
your life. That would be truly crazy.

Anyway, I value you comments and hope you can set me "straight" about
this. Pun intended.

Thanks. Hope this helps.

PP
.

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