Re: Conversation

"Top" <top@xxxxxxxxxxxxxx> wrote in message
news:gomlrt$clk$1@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Just had a very hard conversation with my kids (aged 24 & 26). I told them
about their mother's addiction. They seemed to take it seriously and I
stressed to them how it is to support her and help her beat this. I urged
them to have a conversation with their mother about this. Maybe this will
be another slap in the face wakeup call.

Top

--
To the bachelor, a wedding ring symbolizes a vicious circle.

This really isn't my place to poke my nose in, nor to tell you what to do,
however, you might want to consider this...

You and your children and her friends have been (even unwittingly) her
co-dependents. It's very rare that co-dependents can perform a successful
intervention on an addict without professional help. Just having everyone
tell her that she has a problem is not going to do it (she already knows she
has a problem even if she won't admit it). Facing her down, willy-nilly,
could have some dire consequences that you may not have considered. I'm not
saying you are/will be the cause of it, but she could feel betrayed, angry,
cornered, and desperate - even to the point of suicidal behavior. If
nothing else she will have rationalizations/excuses that you might not have
the expertise to counter. Facing her down in hurt and anger can lead to an
out-of-control situation that you won't know how to fix.

Yes, I certainly think she needs an intervention, but I think you need to do
it in a systematic, proven approach and with professional help. If you do
this on your own you may wind up with disastrous results. I know you're
justifiably angry (I would be ready to beat her to within an inch of her
life), but it does sound like you still care for her. If you genuinely want
her to get help and get better, you need someone there who can keep their
cool, knows the ropes, and knows how to keep the intervention from getting
out of control.

Again, pardon my intrusion, but even in the short time I've been posting
here I've come to care about the members of this group, and I don't want to
see anyone here have more pain added to their already painful existence.

Hugs,

CatNipped


.

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