Re: FFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKKKKKK

"Juba" <juba@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx> wrote in message
cllmd <cllmd@xxxxxxxxxxx> wrote in message:
FUCKFUCKGUCKGUVKDFHJIQ4\ -9` PI]J65Q
3Odfeokdjfn5y3o]ERG -DAF0=8;/SOLDEJIKGIU5 M, 09EOFRDLFG

My sentiments exactly.

Sorry Lavon. Keep yer chin up.

--
Juba
www.masterjuba.com

Check out the PAYNE HERTZ blog
http://paynehertz.blogspot.com


Thanks, Juba! You know, what is weird is that, having the sucker in my
system now, this a.m., i can take them on. chris had to do almost all of
the paperwork, running around, appts. with his union and that sort alone
this last year. Now, i can help.

I'm still kinda funky from yesterday's puker, but even with a quarter of one
sucker in my system this a.m., i have regained the confidence i'd lost, just
due to having less pain. I forget how much of me my pain robs.

What's sad is that, i've never planned on being this...experienced. I've
always kept a silly and optomistic outlook....thru the tumor thing, thru
being raped twice, thru going thru rehab and sinking as low as i did during
my active irresponsibility. I've always been able to get back to that
"alternate reel" part of me. I delight in Looney Tunes & Warner Bros
cartoons....chris and i giggle a lot. I also tend to be able to find the
softer side of those who come off as rather coarse. What is joyful to me is
that, that part of me seems to be able to touch damaged folks and bring them
out into the sunlight somewhat. Just had it happen again last Tuesday, with
a church woman who is in the hospital. I'm able to show her the damaged
parts of me, but am still able to dance on those scars. Sounds most
immodest, but it's true and i take such fulfillment in that. On Actiq, i
can take on folks who need a positive "invite-or"....someone who has gone
thru the deep ugly and can still sing. On the short term crap, i didn't
have the amount of time it takes to do that. The suckers give it back to
me.

I've not said this, but it also gives chris his wife back...to a certain
extent. We went to dinner Friday night.

still hafta shower, change guitar strings, and meet with the duet for
special music this afternoon....but the cooler weather is here, and so am i!

deep peace to you, Juba....Lavon


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