Re: Binary Humor


"Aapo" <aapo@xxxxxxx> wrote in message
news:46li39Fbm8doU1@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Mickey wrote:
There are two types of people in the world: Italians and those
that
wish they were!
Right sentiment, wrong nation.
:-)

Alex -- Rule Britannia!

No, paisano... she got it right!

No, she didn't. And neither did he. :-]

Aapo, read the following and then feel free to respond in kind ...
;-)

YOU KNOW YOU HAVE BEEN IN FINLAND TOO LONG, WHEN.....

1. You rummage through your plastic bag collection to see which ones
you should keep to take to the store and which can be sacrificed to
garbage.

2. As you walk past the Parliament Building in Helsinki,and see the
statues is titled "Svinhufvud" you no longer read it as "Swinehead"
.... instead you think "What a good Swedish name!"

3. When a stranger on the street smiles at you:
a. you assume he is drunk
b. he is insane
c. he's an American

4. You don't think twice about putting the wet dishes away in the
cupboard to dry.

5. A friend asks about your holiday plans and you answer "Oh, I'm
going to Europe!" meaning any other Western European country outside
Scandanavia.

6. You no longer scrunch up or fold your paper money. You always put
your money in your wallet.

7. You see a student taking a front row seat and wonder "Who does he
think he is!!??"

8. Silence is fun.

9. The reason you take the ferry to Stockholm is:
a. duty free vodka
b. duty free beer
c. to party hearty...no need to get off the boat in Stockholm, just
turn around and do it again on the way back to Finland.

10. Your coffee consumption exceeds 6 cups a day and coffee is too
weak if there is less than 10 scoops per pot.

11. You pass a grocery store and think "Wow, it is open, I had better
go in an buy something!"

12. Your native language has serioously deteriorated, now you begin to
"eat medicine", "open the television", "close the lights off", and
tell someone "you needn't to!" Expressions like "Don't panic" creep
into your everyday language.

13. You associate pea soup with Thursday.

14. Your idea of unforgivable behavior now includes walking across the
street when the light is red and there is no WALK symbol, even though
there re no cars in sight.

15. Your notion of streetlife is reduced to the few teenagers hanging
out in front of Helsinki railway station on Friday nights.

16. Your bad mood becomes your good mood.

17. Sundays no longer seem dull with all the stores closed, and begin
to feel restful instead.

18. "No comment" becomes a conversation strategy.

19. You finally stop asking your class "Are there any questions?"

20. The fact that all of the "v's" and the "w's" are together in the
phone directory seems right.

21. Your old habit of being "Fashionably late" is no longer
acceptable. You are always on time.

22. Hugging is reserved for sexual foreplay.

23. You begin to understand Jussi Jyylanpaarvi's broadcast of the
hockey game.

23. You refuse to wear a hat, even in -30 degree weather.

24. You hear loud-talking passengers on the train. You immediately
assume:
a. they are drunk
b. they are Swedish-speaking
c. they are American d. all of the above.

25. You give up on trying to find fat-free food and pile on the
butter, cream and sugar.

26. You know how to fix herring in 105 different ways.

27. You eat herring in 105 ways.

28. You no longer look at sports pants as casual wear, but recognize
them as semi-formal wear.

29. You can now reconstruct the missing letters on a building. For
example MERI.........LIITTO OY.

30. You have undergone a transformation:
a. you accept mustamakkara (Black-blood sausage) as food
b. you accept alcohol as food
c. you accept.

31. You understand why the Finnish language has no future tense.

32. You no longer have to search for the flushing mechanism on the
toilet.

33. You no longer see any problem wearing white socks with loafers.

34. You no longer correct people who say MAC Donald's.

35. You just love Jaffa.

36. You've come to expect Sunday morning sidewalk vomit dodging.

37. You know that "religious holiday" means "let's get pissed."

38. You enjoy salmiakki.

39. You know that "mens public bathroom" is another phrase for
sidewalk.

40. You know that more than three channels means cable.

41. You get all the Swedish jokes.

42. When you're hungry you can peel a boiled potato like lightning.

43. You've become lactose intolerant.

44. You accept that 80 degrees C in a sauna is chilly, but 20 degrees
C outside is freaking hot.

45. YOU CAN'T UNDERSTAND WHY PEOPLE LIVE ANYWHERE BUT IN FINLAND!!!!



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