Thank you

Thank you all for your kind messages. We had dad here until yesterday late
afternoon. We had X-mas on Saturday with the kids. The rest of the time
dad and Ed watched football, we talked about a lot of things and I spent
some time alone with my own thoughts and grieving. I do take solace in the
fact mom is no longer suffering but I miss her terribly. Ed had to drive
dad home because it was too difficult for me to leave him. My brother
arrived this a.m. at dad's and he is helping dad take care of other
business. We are also getting dad a palliative hospice care which he is
eligible to receive, a life line, plus the woman who was taking care of them
before will continue and he gets meals on wheels. I will be visiting him at
least once a week. Time will tell how this will work.

I have had my mother visit me, believe it or not. She speaks to me in in
different ways such as objects dropping when we are talking about just that
very thing. I just know it is her and I choose to believe that ... it is
comforting to me. If only I could touch her and see her; even one more
time. After she had passed, they waited until I reached the house (at my
request). I was able to hold her and kiss her and was alone with her for a
while. That too made me feel better. She passed wearing a pretty new pick
bed jacket that I had given to her as an early X-mas present. I also burn a
candle continuously for her. I just feel her presence surrounding me which
gives me some peace. At other times I feel a big empty hole. I am sure the
mood changing will continue for quite some time. It was difficult when all
my relatives left; I cried each time one, two, three... went out the door on
Monday ... back to life again.

Again, thank you all for your support and caring. It means so much to me.
I would like to forget that year 2006 ever existed; it has been the most
difficult and painful year of my life. Things can only get better; unless
dad's time is also very short left with us too. I need some time to catch
my breathe. Love to all of you.

Nettie


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