Update Archer^Jo

Hi Fmily,

It appears I'm now having major emotional reaction to the 12/2 fire.
I've dealt well with all the trades that have been here (roofers,
electricians, plumbers, drywallers, painters) starting 1/9. Have had
what initially felt like a welcome breather with no one here yesterday.

Instead I just suddenly feel overwhelmed and discouraged. This doesn't
feel like my home anymore. Having gone through fixing this place up
starting last February, it was very hard but joyful. Now it seems
patched and there is no joy anymore.

I'm buried in the details my insurance company is demanding.
Pain/exhaustion have been high, but I was able to sleep from 9pm to 5am
and stay on schedule. I've gained 7# which pisses me off.

On Wed 2/2 my contractor and "structure" adjuster from Allstate will be
here at 9:30 for an "inspection". My jacuzzi has burns on it, the wall
and floor tiles have black marks that won't come off, the grout is
missing or yellowed and even though the bathroom is where it all
started, jerkoffs Allstate and contractor didn't allow any $$ for
repairs of this area! Thus the "inspection". The contractor now gets
it but Allstate does not.

Contractor's plumber was here on 1/23 and said the jacuzzi needs to be
replaced as well as the tile and it will take 10-14 days. So Allstate
is bitching.

Then the high end carpeting I bought will be professionally cleaned.
Contractor already believes some areas will remained stained and it'll
have to be decided if just a certain area needs to be replaced or *all*
of it. It was hell having it done the first time but joyful to see the
result. No joy now.

Then my house will be thoroughly cleaned top to bottom - supposedly -
and that will be the end. Could be as late as April.

This doesn't feel like home.

Spouse thing continues to have outrageous mood swings so nothing has
changed there. I find myself muttering under my breath "***, and
other more explicit vulgarities" on a daily basis. I guess that part of
home will never change. Just try to stay out of the line of fine.

I've had an ear infection so can't wear my hearing aid, have acute
bronchitis, costochondritis and so much pain everywhere it seems even my
eyelashes hurt.

My friend, Chris who discovered the fire has been working elsewhere then
Monday I was moving LR furniture, vacuuming and there he was in my
kitchen (he has a key). I had to laugh as my hair was dirty, flipped
askew on my head, I was a sweaty mess wearing my pajama top and giant
sweatpants. What a sight I must have been and what a welcome sight he
was. He immediately helped me finish moving the really heavy stuff.
The multiple hugs felt good even though the costo feels like my ribs are
broken.

He's going to stop in briefly every day for the rest of this week to
"keep me out of trouble". He 'gets' the pain I have, the lack of
hearing, etc. and doesn't want me to keep hurting myself. It was too
late yesterday and now I'm stiffened/frozen in pain.

I've popped onto AMF on occasion. Lots of names I don't know. So many
posts I have to mark all read though do read some and wish my head was
on straight enough to offer welcomes and support to more of you.
Especially since you've been so supportive for me.

Spouse thing is getting up and I am going to take a much needed shower.
I need my jacuzzi dammit!

Oh, this computer!! This jabberwockjo profile (when it died & needed
repairs) I've lost all of you from addressbook, bookmarks, and other
than newly dl'd msgs all that was in my NS Inbox, Sent, Drafts were a
few 2000 msgs. That lost stuff is probably on here somewhere. Maybe
I'll eventually find the 5 missing years. I did get an external hard
drive and on Sunday backed up everything <she said sounding like she
knows what she's doing>.

Miss you all and hope I'll eventually catch up on how you're feeling,
what you've been up to and meet the newbies (or figure out who has
changed screen names).

Thanks for reading my unintended long bull***.

O's 'n X's, Jo

--
* Archer^Jo^Lula reporting from the Tower of Babble
* Latitude 42.238, Longitude -83.687
* My site: http://mywebpages.comcast.net/eccentricity/
* FMS page: http://mywebpages.comcast.net/eccentricity/fms_etc.html
* Ltr/Normals: http://www.healingtides.net/a_letter_to_normals.htm
.

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