It's A Start

My psychologist and my doctor both REALLY want me to write - a book, an
article for a health journal - SOMETHING. I've been trying, sorta, but
it keeps changing, depending on my mood that day.

Here's something I wrote this morning. Whaddya think?

----------------------------------------

Coping - Or Not
Tips on Surviving a Traumatic Injury or Illness
by Jane Livingston

My story is not an uncommon one, I'm sure. I am not a doctor or
therapist. I have no
medical background at all. What I am is - A Survivor. Any information
contained in this
document comes from personal experience alone. This is my story, and
the things I
learned from it.

I am a 43-year-old woman who's always considered herself bright and
logical and
strong and capable. I was trained as a writer, but have had many
different occupations
over the years. Whatever pays the mortgage payment. In 2004 I was
working as the
Manager of a busy Meat Department at our local Big Box grocery. This
job involved a
lot of concentration and organization, attention to detail, a great
deal of energy and a
strong back. I was good at it.

One night everything changed. After a hard day at work, I was playing
a game of
Scrabble with my son when I had a seizure. It only lasted about a
minute or so. I was
shaking and drooling and my eyes had sort of rolled back in my head.
When I came to,
my adult son seemed quite concerned and was asking me if I was okay. I
felt scared
and disoriented and we put the game away. I thought I'd just
overworked myself and
needed to rest and relax from my stressful day.

The next day I told my co-workers about the incident the night before
and they
convinced me to see a doctor as soon as possible. I'd had other
disconcerting lapses
in time - blackouts - recently, and they were worried for me. They
were right to be.
Who knows where I'd be if not for their nagging me about going to the
doctor?

I phoned and got an appointment for 11:00 that morning - and I
haven't worked a day
since.

I live in a small town with only partial hospital facilities. When I
went to see my local
Physician and explained what happened, he put me in an ambulance to the
nearest city
for a CT Scan and they decided right then and there to do an MRI. I
was then put back
in the ambulance for a two-hour drive to the big city. All this time I
had no idea what
was wrong with me. I minimized it in my mind, telling myself (and
others), "There's
nothing wrong with me. All this fuss over little old me? It's
probably just
precautionary."

They don't send people by ambulance to the Neurosurgical wing of a
large hospital for
precautionary measures. I had a two inch aneurysm on my left temporal
lobe. I didn't
know that until hours later, when a Neurosurgeon finally told me why I
was there.
When he did, he said, "You have an aneurysm. It's BIG," and
formed his fingers and
thumb into a golfball.

Some time later, another Neurologist told a colleague (while standing
in front of me),
"When they're this big, they literally call them Giants." He had
a look of glee on his
face that made me never want to visit that doctor again. I was not a
medical anomaly to
be astounded at. I was and am a patient who deserves the utmost of
respect, help and,
when it comes to discussing my condition - decorum.

I've had good treatment and bad treatment since this saga began.
I've been treated
with dignity and compassion and also with disdain and lack of
understanding. I've lost
my job and have had to jump through hoops trying to get any assistance.
In fact, I still
don't know if I ever will get any assistance from any government
programs, though I
believe my case to be one that these programs were designed to help.

And through it all, I've been coping - or not.

I've developed Epilepsy, or maybe had it all along - ever since I
somehow grew the
aneurysm in my head. I also seem to have post-traumatic stress
disorder, which I think
could have been prevented if I'd received good assistance from the
healthcare
community earlier in my treatment.

I'm a strong proponent now in early communication with a Patient
Advocate. I think one should be provided for all patients who've
survived a major trauma - immediately, not once they start to exhibit
signs that they need help.

Like dehydration - once you're thirsty, you're already dehydrated.

With this book, I hope to speak to many:

(A) Survivors - you need to know you are not alone and there are
people and agencies
that can help you if you're having a hard time;

(B) The Medical Community - you need to know that many survivors have a
great deal
of trouble coping during and after any traumatic illness or injury and
they need and
deserve more care than they're getting;

(C) Families - you need to know that you don't need to shoulder the
burden on your
own;

(D) The General Population - you need to know that people may change,
but we're all
still human and survivors deserve the same degree of respect as anyone
else - and
even admiration for the trials they've been through - no matter HOW
different they may
be after a trauma.

-----------------------------------------

That's as far as I've gotten so far. So, any comments? If I fill out
those four categories with my own personal experiences, do you think
it'd maybe be good for a magazine like Health or Lifestyle Today or
something? I kinda get the jitters thinking about the rejection
letters (LOL) but if I finished it (and got some ink for my damned
printer) I could send it off to a few different mags and see what they
think.

Thanks for any constructive comments. :o)

Take GOOD Care,

Jane

.

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