Re: Things to Say After Farting

According to Kelly F., there is a US Airforce custom of saying, "Howdy!" after farting in flight, to assure one's colleagues that one's intentions are peaceful.

Jimmy K. tells of a friend who says, "Speak to me, oh, toothless one!" Similarly, Bazzbull says, "Speak to me, ol' toothless wonder!" And EHALL says, "Oh, toothless one! Your voice has changed but your breath is still the same!"

TGeaber says, "It's that *** talking behind my back again!" And Roman K. says, "Did you hear what that *** said?!" Eimiee2 says, "Some *** is talkin' *** behind your back."

Gpgo and his frat brothers say, "Oops! A sudden loss in cabin pressure!"

Murray E. sends this account of a response to belching: "Once, when Dorothy Parker was at a dinner, a man burped quite loudly she is reported to have looked at him and said, 'why didn't you use the other end and save your teeth?'"

According to BSneed, after Czechs let out a silent fart, they announce the fact by saying, "Soytka," to let their friends know they might be smelling something. The word refers to a kind of little bird.

According to Rodney Y., his father says after farting, "Speak up, *** - Don't take that ***!"

Another father, that of LeNaye, says the following: "There's a kiss for you!" or "The ducks are calling." or "Damn frogs..."

When someone else farts, Mack says, "Oh, stop your bragging!"

According to Chris, the thing to say in northern England after farting is, "More tea, Vicar?"

Ron C.'s father, a Royal Navyman, would say, "Don't worry - plenty for all!"

Bill J. and Matt K. say, "When farts are transported past another while still engulfed in one's pants, one should ask the perpetrator, 'Are you draggin' skags??'"

According to Marci, Rodney Dangerfield said, "Hey, did somebody step on a duck?" in Caddyshack.

According to Brandon P., in Mexico, what you say is, "Reza por tu alma porque tu cuerpo ya esta podrido." This means, "Pray for your soul because your body is already rotten."

Glen B. suggests announcing, "AQA!" which means "air quality alert!"

Joel D. and his college friends say, "Take that, underwear!" or would substitute other victims such as atmosphere, pants, ozone layer, nose etc.

According to Rowan E., in the Australian army one says, "Keep calling, Sir! We'll find you!"

Altond had a high school friend who would say, "Catch that and paint it blue!" And in the army, when a person farted, someone would say, "Colonel who?"

David H. says that before you fart, you should say, "Did you hear that?" and when the other person says, "What?" you let it rip.

If someone else produces a particularly odiferous emission, ifartoften says you should say, "What crawled up in you and died?"

GMR reports hearing this one in Scotland, "Well, there's no point in having an arse if you can't let it rejoice in song!"


Mike Pritchard wrote:

I've read a few articles over the last week that suggest GWB's poll numbers are crashing again, after a slight rise following hurricane Rita.

According to the latest poll by CBS, his job approval rating is the lowest ever recorded on that question, since the poll first began in 1983!!

I don't care what you say, that is significant.

Here's an excerpt from the article on the CBS website:

"President Bush's overall job approval rating has reached the lowest ever measured in this poll, and evaluations of his handling of Iraq, the economy and even his signature issue, terrorism, are also at all-time lows. More Americans than at any time since he took office think he does not share their priorities.

The public's concerns affect their view of the state of the country. Sixty-nine percent of Americans say things in the United States are pretty seriously off on the wrong track — the highest number since CBS News started asking the question in 1983. Today, just 26 percent say things are going in the right direction."


For those who might argue CBS is showing bias against GWB, I would say "don't be too sure about that." At least on the broadcast edition of their news, I found the slant to go the other way, actually.

In particular, when covering GWB's buddy Rove, they seemed to go out of their way to downplay the current situation, with regard to what is happening and what could happen. I thought to myself "wow....was that strange, or what?" Their report seemed totally out of touch with reality.

I think CBS's poll is a lot closer to real public opinion than some might think--in particular, the busheviks.

I can see them all turning to face the corner now, hands over their ears, singing "la la la la la...."

Too funny, sometimes...

Mike


.