Re: TR 7/16 Big Show Synopsis
- From: Brady <waterclock@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
- Date: Sat, 18 Jul 2009 03:53:22 -0500
On Jul 17, 7:26�am, Brady <watercl...@xxxxxxxxxxxxx> wrote:[...]
What's happenin', people?
Hmm. OK, regarding which of the following would you like to hear me meander?
A) The painful 'thing' I've got goin' on in my mouth. (It's not a tumor.
B) The sociology of paranoid conspiracy theories.
C) This one time, in college, when I got 'cited' for something,
resulting in the revocation of my driver's license for a couple of months.
E) None of the above; you suck.
C sounds like it could be a good story. Alan usually covers the
For a time, when I was in college, I enjoyed drinking beer. Or mixed drinks. Or 'fruit-flavored shooters.' Or whatever else could be concocted by a bartender. But beer was the mainstay, and I'd sometimes drink a lot of it in one evening.
There was an area near campus known as The Strip. It was a several-block area lined with bars and nightclubs. My favorite watering hole was what I guess could be referred to as a dive bar -- Egan's. It was small and narrow and loud. I think I may have described this place to you once before. There was usually a band performing, and you'd have to walk through the band -- I mean, *while they were performing* -- to reach the restrooms. If you needed to visit the restroom, you'd dodge a bass player, step past the drummer, and there you were. They also had a Galaga arcade game in the area near the restrooms. For a while, that was my favorite video game.
Directly across the street from Egan's was a place called The Houndstooth. It was more of a sports bar, with TVs and video trivia monitors lining the walls. They also had pool tables and arcade games.
Sometimes when I'd go to The Strip, I'd drive and leave my vehicle in the parking lot behind The Houndstooth. Usually I'd start out at Egan's, then after a few beers I'd walk back across the street to The Houndstooth. Then I'd usually go back to Egan's before wandering down to The International Deli, perhaps. Then I'd usually make my way *back* to Egan's. And *then*, if the crowd thinned at Egan's and they announced last call, I'd sometimes wander down to The Booth, which seemed more often than not to stay open the latest of all the places on The Strip.
After making the rounds -- after pretty much everything was closed or closing -- I'd usually walk up the street to a convenience store located about a block away from Egan's. I'd load up on snacks -- chips and cookies and maybe a Honey Bun, along with some Diet Mountain Dew.
One particular night, I walked back to the parking lot with my sack of snacks -- I was parked behind The Houndstooth -- and I got in my vehicle. I got in; put the key in the ignition; turned on the radio; and sat there, eating my snacks, listening to the radio. The vehicle was in 'park' the whole time. And then I heard a knock on the window.
"Can you step out of the car, sir?"
In this state -- maybe in every state -- a person is considered 'in actual control' of a motor vehicle if you're simply sitting in the driver's side and the key is in the ignition. If I'd gotten in and placed the keys in the *glove compartment*, for instance, it would've been one thing. But that's not what I did. I was in the driver's side and the key was in the ignition.
So I got out of the vehicle and the police officer shined a light in my eyes. I don't think he even had me 'walk a line.' I think he did have me 'follow the light' with my eyes.
And then I took a trip 'downtown.'
And my vehicle was towed.
Again, I'd not been driving; I was just listening to the radio, enjoying my snacks. But legally, I'd been in 'actual control' of a motor vehicle. In the eyes of the law, I'd been operating a vehicle while impaired. I ended up paying a fine. And my driver's license was revoked for a couple of months. And I attended an alcohol/driver's education course.
So there you have it.
Hey, I just realized something. By discussing this here, I've preempted any Election Eve Surprise, if & when I run for public office. If a reporter calls and asks me about it, all I have to say is, "I've already discussed it in the Letterman newsgroup."
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