This Week on LS (7/24)

British Open Sunday! I'd never bet against Tiger, but it sure would be
fun to see Sergio win today.


Monologue Predictions

"Ladies and Gentlemen, are you like me? Is this heat wave just making
you crazy? How 'bout those poor folks up in Queens? They lost their
power, and there were reports of fighting, looting, rioting... or, what
most Queens residents describe as "your typical Saturday night."

And did you hear about that poor Christie Brinkley? "Supermodel
Extraordinaire" Christie Brinkley? The reason she's divorcing her
husband? He had an affair with a 19-year-old girl.

[Audience boos]

I know, I know... terrible, just terrible... when asked to comment,
former President Bill Clinton [audience laughter]... former President
Bill Clinton [audience laughs, cheers]... this stuff just writes
itself, doesn't it...

And what about President Bush? He's been heard using foul language,
he's giving back rubs to strange women... looks like, after six years,
he's finally taking advice from Clinton!


And the guest list...

Monday
Colin Farrell
India.Arie

On The Tonight Show last week, some lady came out of the audience
during Colin's panel and started talking to him for a few seconds
before security intervened. Did anyone see this, or was it cut?

Is it pronounced "India Arie" or "India Dot Arie?"

Tuesday
Greg Kinnear
Some band I've never heard of

We recently watched "The Matador" with Kinnear and Pierce Brosnan. Not
the greatest movie ever, but well acted and written. Definitely a solid
video pick.

Wednesday
Scarlett Johansson
The Teutels

Scarlett Johansson: can I just say--- capital "H", capital "O", capital
"TTTTTTTTTTTTTTT"

"Match Point" was excellent. I can't imagine "Scoop" being as good,
mainly because Woody's in it.

When Mt. St. Helens erupted, debris from the explosion flooded large
sections of the Teutel River.


Thursday
Johnny Depp
The Spinners

Johnny Depp: can I just say--- capital "H", capital "O", capital
"TTTTTTTTTTTTTTT"

My oldest kid has seen "Pirates II" three times already. Apparently,
she thinks it's pretty good.


Friday
Jamie Foxx
Tom Dreesen

I wouldn't go see that "Miami Vice" movie if you promised me there'd be
a $100 bill hiding under my seat.

Gee, I wonder if Dreesen will have any Sinatra stories?


Tom

.

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